Hell Holes
by LexiRae
Summary: Given the choice between jail or Camp Green Lake, which would you choose? Lauren and Alexis, two fifteen-year-old girls, have made the decision that will drastically change their life forever. But did they make the right choice? Find out here!
1. Chapter 1: Busted

Chapter One: Busted

The sun blazed overhead as Alexis skipped merrily down the street. Now that school was out for the summer, she could focus on what really mattered in life: her unstoppable, untraceable, totally wicked crime spree! For the past twelve years she had been doing this, and not once had she been caught. By following simple, carefully planned out steps, she was able to pull off just about anything she could possibly want without leaving any evidence behind whatsoever.

Indeed, Alexis was rather proud of her record. The city had started referring to her as 'The Ghost' because she was never seen, rarely heard, and there was no way to stop her. This summer, the Ghost was back and only one thing had changed; she now had a partner in crime. Her very own P.I.C.

Catching sight of her P.I.C., commonly referred to as Lauren, Alexis jay-walked across the street and matched paces with Lauren.

"First day on the job; excited?" Alexis asked, looking forwards with a serious, stony expression firmly in place. Without waiting for a response, she pulled out two sleek pairs of black-lens sunglasses. She handed one pair to Lauren while slipping the other over her eyes.

The glasses matched Alexis perfectly. Wearing black heels, black pants that curved to her figure nicely, a tight apple-red tank top and a black, unzipped, sweater that was the same colour as her chest-length raven hair she normally would have looked a bit suspicious. But the fact that she was carrying a portable radio and blasting the theme for Halloween H2O just gave others the impression that she was simply a messed-in-the-head kind of girl.

It was the perfect cover.

"Should I be excited?" Lauren asked, also looking straight ahead. She was wearing a bright blood-red hoodie that hung down to her knees and dark blue jeans. Her sunglasses were almost too big, but she put them on anyways. "If I get too excited, I might mess up." Lauren had also achieved a nickname for herself: the Darkness. She'd also never been caught throughout her line of business.

The two wandered down the street, Halloween H2O theme blasting in their wake. A mother with a stroller crossed to the other side of the street, glaring at them. Alice grinned at her and waved cheerfully. "She has no idea who we were," she mused under her breath. "No idea at all that we're… The Ghost and the Darkness!"

Somewhere in the distance, a distinct "Dun… Dun… DUUUUUN!" went off.

"Anyways, time to get down to business," Alexis stated, her mood suddenly shifting back to reflect her intensity. She placed her hands on the sides of her sweater and pulled each side back, revealing the contents of the lining. On the left side, their were several hand guns, a few knives, and even a couple hand grenades attached to the liner. On the right, packets of cocaine, mushrooms, ecstasy, crystal meth, and some green gummy bears were along the outer edges. In the center was a thick, folded up list of victims.

"We could start out small… you know, something like telling those damned brats who made fun of our height that we have some candy, then send them home with a pocketful of evil gummy-bears, secretly rigged to attack at midnight. That's always fun," Alexis smirked while Lauren chuckled in agreement. "Or we can go for tapping into top secret pentagon files and change all their information again. It's not as much fun seeing as how all the important knowledge has already been erased, so there's not a lot of variety. But now that they think they know the whereabouts of Lord Voldemorte that might be fun to watch." Lauren nodded as she followed along. "You know, something like, Location: Up your ass and around the corner."

"Or, 666 Completelyfake Ave." Lauren interjected "They never seem to catch those kinds of things."

Alexis nodded. "Or we can come out kicking and screaming."

Lauren arched one eyebrow. "Continue…"

Alexis grinned evilly. "I'm talking full out, mass homicide, assault, arson, grand theft auto, reckless endangerment, disturbing the pigeons, and of course, what crime would be worthwhile if burglary wasn't involved!"

"A boring one?" Lauren shrugged. Alexis chuckled.

"Well if we're going to go through with that last one, then you should know that Tony, the guy who works at the place directly three o'clock from where we're standing right now—no! Don't look!—is our backup. Whenever a job starts to fall apart, we back down before there's a chance to get caught. If we split up, we meet at Tony's. Don't worry, he's cool. We've been tight ever since the great bank heist of '97. I was four, he was nine. This was back when his parents owned the business. You remember that don't you, Lauren? Yeah, we took down 79 men from the S.W.A.T. team, the P.D., the D.O.T. and the S.T.U.P.I.D.S. And one friggen badass spider, but that's another story. WATCH OUT!" Alexis paused mid-monologue and whipped out a hand gun, shooting at a spot on the sidewalk about two and a half feet away from where Lauren and Alexis stood completely composed. An evil, havoc-wreaking spider had been eavesdropping on their dastardly villainous plots.

At the very same second, Alexis dove down a convenient back alley, pushing Lauren ahead of her. Ironically, no one on the street seemed even remotely phased by the sudden shot. It was as if this sort of thing happened every day. Which it did, however that is not the point. Also, neither of the girls was seen.

"Anyways," Alexis inhaled deeply and continued with her brief autobiography. "A little over 9696 billion had gone missing. Took me about eleven years to get rid of it all, but I managed to spend the last of the cash this weekend. On these very sunglasses, actually."

Lauren poked out her head in the public's eye. No one seemed to notice so they continued across the street to Tony's. She turned back to Alexis who cleared her throat. "So what are you thinking, Darky? Oh, and remind me later. If we do get split up for any reason during one of our hits, we skim the high ways for a while, turn onto route 90 and I can show you how to get to Tony's from there. No cell phones. They're too easily tapped. If we need to communicate, walkie talkies are really the only way to go. And even those are seriously out of date."

The two girls stopped right in the middle of the road they were currently trying to cross. A black Mercedes convertible stopped suddenly, less than a foot away from where Alexis was standing. Aside from the incredibly fast speed the car had been moving at, they both stood completely still as if the car had been parked the entire time. "That's just Tony," Alexis mumbled under her breath.

"Hmm. I think it sounds like a lot of effort," Lauren thought aloud, watching the black-tinted windows through narrowed eyes. "I personally like the idea of the last one, but—" she was cut off as a police car came flying down the street with its sirens screaming. "Give me a gun!" Lauren told Alexis who tossed one to her and held one for herself. Lauren took aim and shot out the tires while Alexis took care of the windshield.

"Go for Tony's!" Alexis yelled, running across the street. Lauren followed. As they neared the door the police officers jumped out of their car, guns drawn, and hid behind their car doors for safety. "Drop your weapons!" they hollered.

The door to Tony's store opened and the two ran in, shutting the door behind them. Bullets hit the door as the police officers opened fire. Lauren said down calmly in a chair. "Well," she said dryly.

"Something tells me we're going to get caught this time," Alexis sighed, peeking out through a small crack in the door. She watched as Tony, Raul, Amilio, and and George—his Italian Mafia gang buddies—hopped out of the black convertible and began shooting at the cops. Although they were doing quite well, many more cruisers were approaching.

Suddenly, her gaze lifted from the current blood-fest that was going on in the streets, to a dazed, glazed-over stare. She slightly cocked her head to the side and a corner of her lips tugged upwards. "Huh. That gives me a bit of a rush. I've never actually come close to getting caught before."

"Neither have I, and I am not about to start now!" Lauren exclaimed. She leaped from her chair. "There must be some sort of back door out of here!"

She went into a back room and flipped on a light. "Whoa!" The walls were covered in every type of weapon she could imagine. Guns, grenades, flame throwers, bombs, bombs, mines, knives, socks with pool balls in them, and even a few dozen rocket launchers. Lauren stared at them in shock. She turned to Alexis. "What kind of friend did you say Tony was?" she asked quietly.

"The absolute best kind," Alexis sighed happily. "Yepp. I think I kinda fucking love that man."

There was a huge bang on the door. "Police! Open up or stand aside!" Lauren and Alexis exchanged a glance. "We have to get out of here!" The police banged on the door again. "Come out with your hands up! We will use necessary force to detain you if you do not comply. Open the door and surrender peacefully!"

"One second! We're uh… not decent!" Alexis called through the door, taking on the vocal expression of a 50-year old Stepford wife.

Almost completely silently, she leaped across the room, grabbing Lauren's arm as she lead her to the back corner and pressed a button on the wall that was cleverly disguised as a knife sticking out of the wall. A long wooden ladder tumbled down from a hole in the ceiling.

Alexis and Lauren quickly grabbed hold of the ladder. "We can get to the coast, the roofs of these buildings aren't more than a couple feet apart so we'll be able to jump them." She kicked the button back in with her foot. But when they reached the top of the roof, an utterly horrid sight filled her eyes. "Ah… SHIT!" There were at least 50-60 police officers already posed, weapons aimed and ready, pointed at the two PICs. Out by the corner, Tony was being held at gunpoint for if he tried to escape, handcuffed, and looked rather bored.

"TONY, YOU SQUEALER!!" Alexis yelled angrily at the 6'4", body builder.

"Fuck off, they had a gun!" he replied with a guilty tinge in his voice.

"YOU HAVE 746 GUNS DOWNSTAIRS, MORON! NOT TO MENTION ALL THE OTHER CRAP!!" she retorted, leaping forward to push the bastard off the building, but she was held back by a young-looking cop with shaggy, tousled dirty-blonde hair.

"SNITCHES GET STITCHES, TONY!! YOU REMEMBER THAT!" she yelled, realizing they weren't going to let her kick him around for a while.

Another cop grabbed Lauren, who look a bit displeased. "This is just great," she said in a falsely cheery voice. "Thank you SO much, Tony. When I get out, I AM SO GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU BASTARD!" Tony winced. The cops to the three and put them in different cruisers and drove off to the station. Lauren looked out the window, fidgeting with her handcuffs. "Bloody wastes of space."


	2. Chapter 2: Interrogation

_Hey everyone reading this! This is my first story I've put up here, so please review and tell me if I should keep this thing updated. I warn you now that I was in ninth grade with my friend Lauren when we wrote this together, so it's nothing extraordinary, but if you enjoy, please tell me! _

_Also, I have this little thing rated as T, but can some of you more experienced users please let me know if it should be rated M? Thank you!_

Chapter Two: Interrogation and Rash Decisions

They arrived at the station. Tony was put into a cell, and Lauren and Alexis were lead to another room with a mirror on one wall. A bald cop was sitting at table. Lauren looked over at Alexis, who nodded. "Interrogation," they said in unison.

"Please come sit down," the bald cop said with an insincere smile. "I'm Officer Boxwell." Alexis and Lauren were pushed forward and the door closed. Lauren looked over to the wall and waved. "Hi there!" she grinned.

"Hello, Mr. Boxwell. Can I call you Boxy? My friend and I both realize this is an interrogation and of course we are willing to cooperate." Alexis batted her eyelashes innocently as she took a seat opposite the cop, folding her cuffed hands politely in front of her on the mental table.

He seemed mildly shocked by their behavior, but he regained his composure quickly. "Tony Walker. Nice fellow. How do you know him?"

Alexis was careful to answer at the right pace. "Tony is my cousin, Boxy. He paid me about $100 a week to do chores around his shop."

His eyes seemed to accept the answer as they flickered to Lauren. "What about you? Relations?"

"None," she told him, taking the seat next to Alexis. She stretched out her legs. "I'd never met him before today. And I only met him long enough to say… hello… to him." She thought back to the threats she'd made. They weren't empty. Once she was out of here, Tony was going down.

"I see," Officer Boxwell said, not quite believing her. "Well, are you two aware that what you did is considered a federal offense…? Actually, several federal offenses all rolled into one. Shooting out a police car, refusing to comply to police command, being in league with a dangerous criminal, and if my sources are correct, you are also known throughout the community as The Ghost and the Darkness. So if we add in all your previous offenses…" he smirked satisfied. "Well we'd have enough to keep you locked up the rest of your life, and your next few thousand lives after that."

Lauren and Alexis laughed at the same time, in the same fake tone.

"You think _we're_ the Ghost and the Darkness? That's almost funny, but not really. How could we be them. They're like famous, or infamous, or something of the sort."

"And what would you say if I told you that Tony told us you were the Ghost and the Darkness?"

Alexis chuckled. "I'd say that I was right. People _do_ only become cops because they were too stupid to work at McDonalds. Anyways, Boxy, I think you shouldn't really listen to Tony too much. He's been on mushrooms, and crack cocaine since he was old enough to put anything in his mouth or up his nose. And FYI, The Ghost and the Darkness were two lions in South Africa in 1820. They now hang in the museum in Washington DC. Their story was made into a movie, so look for it and watch it if you don't believe me," Alexis finished smugly, leaning back in her chair.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "I _know_ it's a movie, but it also happens to be the nicknames of two highly dangerous criminals we've been tracking for the past 15 years!"

Alexis rolled her eyes, giving away her innocent gaze and replacing it with an annoyed glare. "You haven't been able to catch these people for the last 15 years, and you're accusing TWO INNOCENT LITTLE GIRLS? We're only 15 now, so OBVIOUSLY that is impossible. Are you implying that we were _born_ evil or something?"

He sighed, giving up on receiving a confession. He picked up a folder in front of him and flipped through it. "Look. We've just been informed that we have an opening at Camp Green Lake. It's up to you two to choose. 18 months there, or prison."

"Oooh!" Lauren exclaimed. "What type of camp is that? I've never been to camp before!" she turned to Alexis. "Let's go to camp! That sounds exciting!" she clapped her hands together.

Alexis grinned. "Yeah! We can like make smores, have camp fires, sing cheerful songs about how the world today is such a wonderful place of bunnies and rainbows, and stay up all night giggling with the others in our tent or cabin or whatever, and we can make keychains for our parents!! Eeee… no." She dropped the charade and slid back into her chair. The idea of camp didn't sound too bad, but she didn't feel like all the so-happy-togetherrrrrrr crap was going to please her.

Officer Boxwell raised an eyebrow, trying to remain composed. Jesus these kids are messed, he thought to himself. "So, you choose to go to Camp Green Lake over prison? Great choice, there kiddies. Camp Green Lake helps to reform young offenders such as yourselves…"

Lauren wasn't listening as Boxy went on. She was looking around the room and counting the security cameras.

"So you're both agreeing to go to camp, then?" he turned his attention to Alexis who seemed to be watching an invisible goblin dancing on the metal table.

"Hmm?" Alexis snapped out of it. "Oh, right. Yeah sure," she shrugged. Normally camps weren't her thing, but at least it would be a great opportunity to really plan out all the mischief she can get back into once she returns. "So are we free to go back home and pack while I'm guessing you'll send some cheerfully orange bus to pick us up for camp?" That was the general impression she got from happy campers.

This, however, sent him into near hysterics. "Not exactly. Three officers will escort each of you to your homes, separately. You'll have no more than 15 minutes to put whatever items you require, not including weapons, food items, or anything that can be used to build weapons, drugs or alcohol, and you may only take one bag," he said firmly, losing the laugher.

Mr. Boxwell got to his feel and moved toward the door. "Well. Have _fun_ at camp, girls." Alexis heard a few officers whispering behind the door: "He's just sending them to… camp?" "I thought it was an all-boys camp…" "I think that was more or less because not as many 14-17 year old girls get into trouble and have the lack of brains to not choose prison…"

Alexis perked up. "14-17, ALL GUYS camp? Damn! I need to get caught more often!" she began clapping and hopping up and down anxiously. "Well, I'm gonna go pack, see you on the bus in a bit!" she called, darting out the door, dragging three officers with her.

Lauren walked out the door behind her, flanked by three guards. She turned onto the street and went the way opposite of Alexis. Her house was on the other side of town. As she walked down the street, she noticed that her guards were attracting strange looks. It wasn't every day that a 15 year old went walking down the street surrounded by police officers.

Finally, they got to Lauren's house. She knocked the door and when her mom opened it, Lauren smiled sheepishly. "Hi Mom… I, ah, got into a little bit of trouble today… They're sending me to camp."

"Camp? What kind of camp?" her mom asked as she opened the door wider to admit her daughter and the 3 officers. "Is this one of those summer camps that most families get to send their kids to? How long are you going to be gone?"

"Oh, you know, not too long," Lauren called from her room, where she was throwing random things into her bag. "Only about… 18 months."

"MA!" Alexis bellowed, running through her front door. Her mother entered the room, eyeing the 3 cops suspiciously.

"What the—" she started towards the cops, obviously mad.

"No! They're my friends!" Alexis past her, flying towards her room, grabbing her duffle bag along the way. "They've come to take me to the most magical place on earth!"

Her mother was silent a moment and stared blankly at the floor, deep in thought. "I thought we were all banned from that place in Reno…" she guessed.

Alexis stopped. "Close… I'm going to Camp Green Lake!" she continued to toss things around her room into her large duffle bag. Inside the bag were contents such as her iPod, iPod charger, cell phone and charger, several pairs of clothing, about a dozen, give or take, of her favorite books, a box filled with notebooks, pens and pencils, and a few other necessities. Hey, if she was going to be gone for 18 months, she needed something to take her mind off crime committing. She couldn't spend ALL her time with the guys.

She was back downstairs within 5-10 minutes with her stuffed bag. Quickly thinking, she also grabbed a pack of batteries, deck of cards, and two small flashlights. Her mother met her at the door with two filled water bottles and a digital camera in hand. She thrust them towards Alexis and began pushing her out the door. "Call before you come home, we might move!" she called out.

Managing to shove the new contents into the side pockets of her bag, she hopped onto the waiting bus in her driveway, followed by the three cops. "HEY LAUREN!" Alexis greeted cheerfully, tossing her one of the water bottles and making her way to the long back seat of the bus.

Lauren caught the water bottle with a sigh. "I already have four of these," she called back, but shoved the water into her backpack nonetheless. She relaxed in her seat. "How long is this trip going to take?" she yelled at one of the police officers, who looked started at the direct lack of respect. "I'm already bored here."

Another guard walked onto the bus, carrying a rifle. "So, more kids for Camp Green Lake, eh?" he drawled, walking over to where Lauren and Alexis were sitting. He pulled out two pairs of handcuffs and quickly and efficiently chained the two surprised girls to the seat in front of them. "Enjoy the ride," he grinned.

"Hey, what the hell?!" Lauren shouted. "You can't do that!" The bus doors closed and the vehicle started to move forwards. The guard sat down at the front of the bus and ignored Lauren's annoyed shouts.

"Well, this is certainly inconvenient," Alexis muttered under her breath, not enjoying the fact that the windows were closed. She caught Lauren's eye and the two exchanged an inconspicuous nod. Covering for the noise and movement by coughing, Lauren knocked her backpack upwards and kicked it over to Alexis. Alexis managed to reach inside the front pocket and pulled out a nail file.

"How cliché…" she muttered darkly as she picked at the silver handcuffs. The nearly inaudible click sound rang to her ears, but she left her hands placed on the bar in front of her.

Alexis lightly tossed the nail file to Lauren, timing it so that neither of the guards would see.

"Get comfortable back there, ladies," the bus driver sneered at the two innocent-looking girls. "We'll be at Camp Green Lake in 90 minutes."

"Ah shit," Alexis moaned, leaning forwards and resting her head on the bar while she sneakily removed one hand and pulled out her iPod.

Lauren reached into her bag and pulled out her own iPod. She stuck an earphone in her hear and covered it with her hair. She put it on Shuffle and leaned back with a sigh, quickly placing her hand back on the bar and closed her eyes. None of the guards noticed.

_Well, now that those first two chapters are out of the way, we'll be at the camp in the next chapter. No worries, we're getting there eventually! ___


	3. Chapter 3: Arrival

_Guess where we are today, boys and girls… Teehee. Enjoy! _

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Chapter Three: Arrival

Lauren felt something nudging her in the shoulder. She opened her eyes. "You fell asleep," Alexis quietly informed her. "We're here." Lauren quickly shoved her iPod into her backpack and, following her friend's example, did the handcuffs up again.

The guard got up and walked over to where they were sitting. "Welcome to Camp," he said as he undid the cuffs.

Alexis and Lauren followed the guard off the bus. The sun shone directly into Lauren's eyes, and she winced. "Where's the lake?" she wondered out loud, surveying the sandy, empty landscape.

Alexis grinned, feeling energetic that she was finally able to move freely. She grabbed her water bottle and poured a small portion onto the ground. "There it is!" she exclaimed, turning to Lauren. "Let's go swimming!"

A guard shoved her from behind. "Hold onto that sense of humor. After a few days here, you're not going to remember how to use sarcasm."

Alexis and Lauren stopped dead in their tracks, as though a "pause" button had been pressed. After an awkward moment of silence, they exchanged glances and prompty burst into laughter, falling to the ground and clutching themselves. "Ah… now THAT'S funny," Alexis managed to get out.

"What's funny?" A strange voice said from above them. Lauren and Alexis looked up to see a strange man wearing cowboy boots, a cowboy hat and a pistol holstered to his side. He also had weird sideburns. "My name is Mr. Sir, and you will address me by my name whenever you talk to me, is that clear."

"Not really," Lauren said as she got up off the ground. "Do you think you could explain that again?" Mr. Sir raised an eyebrow, and the guard shook his head in disgust and got back on the bus.

"Please?" Alexis added, pretending to seriously believe the source of their irritation came from their lack of proper manners.

"We're off to a very bad start," Mr. Sir said, spitting out a sunflower seed and motioning for the two girls to follow him. They walked into a building full of shoes and bright orange outfits. "Undress," Mr. Sir commanded without turning around. Lauren gaped at him as he grabbed a pair of boots and tossed them at her.

Alexis looked at him suspiciously before picking up the boots and tossing them back at him. "Why don't you undress, you creepy little sick-minded, child-molesting pedophile," she retorted, crossing her arms.

He narrowed his eyes. After staring him down, he slowly turned around mumbling something about "God damned liberated females of today."

Alexis and Lauren sighed, figuring that that would be the best they were going to get and instead they just pulled off their sweaters and pilled the orange jumpsuits over their fully-clothed selves. As they began to remove their shoes and replace them with boots, Mr. Sir began talking again.

"You will be required to dig one hole every day. Your shovel is your measuring sick. 5 ft. all the way around, from every single direction," he mumbled, turning back around. "Follow me," he stalked off outside. Alexis and Lauren groaned.

"Well this is going to be an interesting 18 freaking months," Lauren sighed sarcastically. Alexis nodded and pulled her hair out from under the jumpsuit. There was a slight breeze that caused her hair to flap behind her as she followed Mr. Sir with Lauren.

The two girls slowly became aware of whispers flying around barely reaching their ears. ("Dude… are those GIRLS?" "How should I know, Ziggy, I've been here for nearly three years now, I think I've forgotten what girls look like…" etc.) Looking around, Alexis saw that there were a group of boys staring at them in disbelief.

"You'll be staying in D-Tent," Mr. Sir continued. "They didn't give us enough notice that they were sending girls. We had time to add the separate shower stalls, but not an extra bunk. So in the mean time, behave yourselves," he warned, stepping into the bunk. There were a few boys inside already. Alexis smirked mischievously, suddenly hating the orange jumpsuit. She decided to take it off the second Mr. Sir left.

As he continued listing off all the rules and such about Camp Green Lake, Alexis plopped her bag down on the bed closest to the back next to a short boy with wild hair. Mr. Sir left after a moment or two and she immediately slid out of the jumpsuit and stuffed it under the cot. When she looked back up, she noticed the guys staring with both amusement and confusion in their eyes.

Alexis nodded slowly towards them. "Sup, boys," she smirked playfully.

Lauren rolled her eyes at her friends' stupid behavior. "What the Hell is wrong with you?" she asked Alexis, sitting down on an empty bed. "Did you just come here to flirt? You sicken me."

A bunch of guys came running into the tent before Alexis could respond. They caught sight of the girls and gaped. "Dude, I knew it!" A tall boy with crazy hair exclaimed. "They ARE girls!"

"No… really?" Lauren said sarcastically. "I never noticed that before."

Alexis looked down at herself and snapped her head back up as though she had just realized something very important. "I am? Really? Now it all makes sense…"

"Hey, why are they so short? Like, I thought this was a 14-17 aged camp," another pitched in. Lauren watched in shock as he pointed at them. "Holy crap, man! That one's smaller than Zero!" The guys burst out laughing and Lauren fumed.

Alexis fought back a laugh, knowing her PIC's temper when it came to her height. Instead she got up and slowly sat Lauren on the cot next to her. "Calm down, Lauren, they're just jealous," she tried to reassure, but it was hard to keep the amusement out of her voice.

Alexis got to her feet once more and walked over to the boys who were trying to contain their laughter. "For the record, we're at a nearly normal height for our age!" she retaliated. "And we could probably kick your ass if you piss us off again!"

There was a pause as the laughter returned in hysterics. "You?! As if! You're just a little girl, you can't FIGHT!" one of them managed to choke out after a few moments.

She cocked an eyebrow in response and pulled her arms backwards as if she was about to snap it forwards into the guy's face when suddenly there was a flash of orange and the boy was screaming on the ground. It took a moment for Alexis to realize that the boy who had been lying quietly on the bed beside her throughout this entire thing was now kicking the crap out of the taller, bigger guy. The others seemed too surprised by his sudden outburst to do anything other than gawk at the two fighting, completely dumbstruck.

"Dude… you got Zero to MOVE!" one of them said incredulously as Zero kept throwing punches and threatening, "You never EVER pick on a girl, you creep!"

Suddenly a man came running into the tent, yelling for them to stop and attempted to pull Zero off of the boy. "Hey, Mom, the girl got Zero to move AND talk!" a guy exclaimed, clearly amused, at the man.

"Mom?" Lauren questioned. "But… that's a guy…"

Finally 'Mom' managed to pull Zero off the other guy, who scrambled to his feet. Zero glared at him one more time, then went back and laid down on his bed. "You never pick on a girl," he mumbled.

"So, I see our new arrivals are here," the man everyone called Mom grinned at them. "Welcome to Camp Green Lake! I am Mr. Pendanski, and I will be your councilor." He looked around him at all the people. "Time for introductions! These boys will be your guides for the first little while, until you know your way around." He proceeded to introduce the D-Tent boys.

Zero: the quiet kid that never talked. Everyone assumed that he was just a stupid, uneducated person.

Alan: the kid that got beat up by Zero. He glared at the girls, and they could already tell he disliked them.

Rex: a scrawny boy wearing dirty coke-bottle glasses.

Theodore: a large guy. Lauren looked at him with her eyebrows raised. How the hell he digs holes, she couldn't figure out.

Ricky: a tall, lean guy with insane, blonde hair.

Jose: he smiled at them slightly.

Stanley: a relatively lean boy who's last name was his first name backwards. Well that's always convenient, Alexis thought sarcastically.

"Well then, Alexis and Lauren, it's a good thing you're here because…" Mr. Pendanski started what they guessed to be his default welcome speech.

Once he left, Alexis sighed and sat back down on her bed, glancing over curiously to the boy lying on the next bed looking rather lonely.

"So what'd you get in for?" Rex asked after a moment. "Taking 11 items into the 10-item-or-less lineup at the mall?" he laughed along with the others. Alexis saw Zero flinch slightly, but he remained still and quiet while the others teased.

Alexis narrowed her eyes at him. "Not exactly…"

"Ever heard of… The Ghost and the Darkness?" Lauren finished.

The laughter immediately stopped, replaced by gasps of both impressed expressions and utter disbelief. "No way! You KNEW them! I heard that they were the BEST in the line of crime work!" Stanley gaped.

Alexis shrugged.

"Haha, what I wouldn't do to shake the hand of the person who ran the famous bank heist of '97," Ricky laughed jokingly.

Alexis and Lauren shared amused expressions, raising one proud eyebrow. At the very same time, without a word, they each extended their arms, hands ready to shake his. Everyone's face dropped, eyes wide, jaws smashing into the floor. Alexis and Lauren burst out laughing, seemingly entertained.

"You're not serious!" Ricky exclaimed. "There's no way that you two did that. That was some shit that went down. And you guys say you did that?"

Alexis nodded. "Yeah, it was nothing."

There was a knock on the side of the tent and Mom poked his head inside. "Supper time, gentlemen. And ladies!" he added hastily as the girls looked over at him. "Let's go!" The guys exited the tent and the two girls followed quickly. Rex, Theodore and Alan dropped back to walk beside them.

"Yo, my name's not Rex," he told them. "I'm X-Ray. This is Armpit," he pointed to Theodore, "and Squid. Ricky is Zigzag, Jose is Magnet, Stanly is Caveman, and Zero is just Zero because there's nothing in his head." Alexis looked over at Zero.

"But he talked earlier," she pointed out.

"Yeah, and that's something else," Squid butted in. "How did you guys get him to talk? He only ever answers to Caveman."

"Maybe it's because we're such awesome people!" Lauren smiled.

They walked into the dining tent and grabbed their trays. Lauren got her food first, and she stared at it in disgust. "What the HELL is this supposed to be?!" she shouted. "This is most definitely NOT edible!"

"Lauren, it's just beans," Alexis sighed. "Come on, don't cause a scene like lovers do on big screens," she smirked at Lauren's expression and walked over to the D-Tent table, which looked rather crowded.

Alexis sighed as she sat down and slowly began eating. She noticed Zero sitting across from her at the table. He seemed so depressed and lonely compared to the others at the camp.

"Hey?" she tried getting his attention.

He looked up, startled that she was speaking to him. "Hi," he mumbled back, poking at his food.

She felt X-Ray nudge her, looking amused as he spoke to the general public at the table.

"Holy crap, she got him talking again!" he laughed. "Yo, what else can you do, Zero?"

He stared at them for a moment before dropping his gaze back to the table shyly. After a few seconds, the random conversation picked up again. Alexis cocked her head to the side. She spoke lower, attempted to have the attention directed somewhere else as they talked.

"Thanks for sticking up for me and Lauren," she dropped her head forwards slightly. "We really appreciated it, and you know, that's a hell of a right hook you got there," she nodded, impressed. "A worthy opponent in a fight, in my opinion. And I don't give compliments like that lightly." She smirked at the nearly unnoticeable smile that tugged threateningly at the corners of his lips.

Lauren took a bite of the beans and shivered. "Oh, yuck!" she groaned, pushing the tray into the middle of the table and putting her head down on the table. "Those beans honestly taste like schist. How can you guys eat that?"

"Easily. You put it in your mouth, chew it a little and then swallow," X-Ray explained with a smirk. "It's not really that hard to do. Would you like me to show you a tutorial?" The other guys laughed and Lauren rolled her eyes.

"Oh you guys are SO funny. See, look, I'm laughing. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. He. He. He. Ho. Ho. Ho. Ha. Ha. And I thought MY jokes were bad."

Zigzag leaned over. "So, Shorty, if you won't eat them, can I have them?"

"What? Oh, sure. Go right a—wait a minute! What the hell did you just call me?!"

"Shorty," Zigzag said with a shrug. "You know, we all have our own names, so you need to have one too. I thought it suited you." All the other guys started laughing as he ignored Lauren's death glares and took a bite of her food.

Lauren turned to Alexis. "Can I join your conversation?" she begged. "I can't stand talking to those idiots over there!" Zero did another one of his half-smiles and looked down at his plate. Alexis just grinned.

"Why, sure thing Shorty. You are always welcome with me and my good friend, Zero." Zero looked up sharply as she said 'friend.'

"Gee, thanks," Lauren said sarcastically. "I can't wait to see what kind of name they'll think up for you. Maybe I should give them some suggestions… What about you, Zero? Wanna help me brainstorm!" She gave Zero a pleading grin and he almost returned it, but looked down at his plate.

"I don't think you meet his standards," Armpit observed. "Looks like Zero don't like you as much as Alexis."

"Oh sure, she gets to keep her name," Lauren rolled her eyes. "Friggen hypocrites. Why can't you call her something else?"

Squid shook his head. "We can't just make up a nickname on the spot. It has to really suit her, and so far we don't really know a whole lot about her. For you, well, Pretty much everyone was thinking that since we first met you. Besides, it could be worse. You could be Barfbag."

"Barfbag? There's a Barfbag? Well, where is he?" Alexis asked, interested.

The guys exchanged a look. "Well actually," X-Ray said hesitantly, "he's not here. Actually… he won't be anywhere but the hospital for a while, I guess. If he comes back. He was bitten by a rattlesnake."

"Ouch, shitty deals," Alexis sighed, shaking her head. Suddenly, she perked up, realizing what he said. "What a minute—rattle snakes usually give a warning before they attack, so how the hell did he manage to get bitten?"

Armpit sighed. "Well, when you've been here as long as Barfbag, you get desperate. He did it on purpose. To get out of here," he told them quietly.

"Oh," Lauren and Alexis responded in unison.

Alexis' head shot back up again after about two seconds. "What ANOTHER minute—there are rattlesnakes here?!" she exclaimed. She instinctively flinched and stomped as she felt something brush against her ankle, not realizing until her foot came crashing down on it that it was just Zigzag's foot. The guys all burst into laughter, including Zigzag though he winced, and Alexis narrowed her eyes.

"Don't worry, dudette," Caveman reassured her, still grinning. "Getting bitten by a rattlesnake ain't the worst thing that can happen to you at Camp Green Lake."

"But getting bitten by a yellow-spotted lizard is," X-Ray finished in a low voice, as if he was telling a scary story. The atmosphere around the table suddenly changed. It was now tense and hushed as X-Ray informed the girls about yellow-spotted lizards. Once he finished, it was all dead quiet as Alexis and Lauren shuddered in unison.

Suddenly Alexis felt two strong hands grabbing her ribs and Squid, who was sitting between her and Armpit, shouting "BLAGH!" in her ear. She jumped about a foot and a half in the air, letting out a shriek as she was caught off guard.

The mess hall burst out in laughter, but the loudest table by far was the D-Tent table. They were in utter hysterics, and even Zero was laughing out loud, although his head still not fully facing the rest of the people at the table, appearing to be trying to hide it.

Alexis narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms stubbornly, feeling her poker-face turning red.

"Someone's a little jumpy today," Caveman tried to say through his laughter.

Alexis looked over and was shocked to see that Lauren, her friend and PIC, was laughing along with the guys. "Lauren!" she exclaimed. "What the hell are you doing?!"

Lauren grinned sympathetically. "Oh, I'm sorry, it's just… that was brilliantly timed," she told her friend. "Come on, you know it was funny! Besides, we're not laughing at you, we're laughing with you!"

X-Ray snorted into his food and Armpit looked away, trying not to look at anyone. "Right, guys?"

"Oh! Yeah, sure!" Zigzag agreed. "See, would never make fun of you. We'd, um… make fun with you… I guess…"

"You had at least a good twelve seconds to think of a lie and that's the best you could come up with?" Alexis looked disgusted. She pushed herself away from the table. "I'm leaving," she announced, turning around and beginning to walk away.

Lauren jumped up and ran beside her. "Hey! Hey, what are you doing?"

Alexis fought back a smirk. "Act like you're trying to get me to go sit back down," she whispered so quietly that only Lauren would be able to hear her amongst the crowds of teenagers. She kept her disgusted expression, although she was trying to pace it smoothly to a calming look. Lauren immediately caught on and kept up the act.

"I have an idea and I need you to cover me for about an hour. When I get back to the tent, cause a diversion so that I can get in relatively unnoticed," she hastily explained before walking outside, leaving Lauren with the others.

Lauren sighed and went back to the table.

"What was that about?" Caveman asked curiously. The table had managed to calm themselves down.

"Is she mad at us?" Zero asked quietly, earning a few shocked stares, but nobody chose to comment on it this time.

"We were just teasing, you know," X-Ray added apologetically. It was clear they didn't want to piss off the only two girls at camp.

"Oh, she's just stressed about her, um… uh, her… hair! Yeah, her hair is pissing her off so she's going for a walk to try to cool herself down. She'll be back soon, I guess," Lauren quickly, smiling. The guys all stared at her, completely and utterly not understanding. Lauren sighed. "It's a girl thing, guys."

"Oh!" there was a collective exclamation.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

_Hmm… I wonder what's going to happen next… Hah, kay, sorry for annoying you all with my little notes… I can't make any promises that I won't keep it up though. _


	4. Chapter 4: Punk'd

Chapter Four: Punk'd 

The guys began standing up, and Zigzag punched Lauren lightly in the shoulder. "Yo, shorty, you coming?"

"Um, yeah sure," Lauren responded, following the other guys out of the dining hall. They walked back to the tent, and before she walked in, Lauren surveyed the camp. There was no sign of Alexis.

***

Alexis checked behind her back as she entered the shed. No one was around. Grinning, she picked up the nearest shovel and examined it. It was her exact height. "Well if it's a war they want, it's a war they're going to get," she smirked playfully and exited the shed. The sun was settling so she figured it would be dark within an hour. Taking in a deep breath, she headed out across the desert.

***

It was roughly 9:00 when Alexis got back to the tent. She peeked inconspicuously through the flap and nodded to Lauren who winked knowingly.

"Hey man, shouldn't Alexis be back by now?" she heard Caveman call out.

"Yeah… if the warden catches her out at night she'd be a dead-girl-walking," Squid quickly agreed.

"Maybe we should go look for her?" she heard Zero contribute.

"Hey everyone!" Lauren quickly exclaimed, catching Alexis' stare through the flap of the tent. The boys all turned to look at her in confusion. "…look at me!" she shouted, starting to river dance on the spot.

Alexis quickly and quietly slipped inside and shoved what she had been carrying into her bag. Eventually, X-Ray and Zigzag looked up and saw her perched on her bed, reading "Smoke Screen" as though she had been there all along.

"Whoa!" they cried out in unison, caught completely off guard. This caused most of the attention to turn back to her.

"I can see where you got The Ghost from," Zigzag chucked. "How long have you been there?"

Alexis shrugged. "A while." Her attention turned to Lauren who had stopped dancing and was now looking slightly curious at her friend. "Well… it's getting late. I'm gonna go get changed," Alexis sighed, not oblivious to the fact that as soon as the words were out of her mouth their heads perked up excitedly. "Lauren, why don't you join me? I was meaning to talk to you about…" her voice trailed off, realizing she had no idea what her cover story had been. The guys raised their eyebrows as the girls met each other's gaze. Lauren frantically began pointing to the side of her head. "my…ear? No, my hair! Right!" Alexis saved horribly, picking up her bag. "My _hair_?" she muttered under her breath as exited the tent with her bag.

Lauren met her inside the apparent girls' bathroom, waiting for an explanation. Before she could say anything, Alexis reached into her bag and pulled out a dead, venom-drained, yellow-spotted lizard. Lauren gasped. "Don't ask how I killed it, but it took a while to make sure all the poison was out," Alexis summed up quickly, holding out the dead lizard. A piece of string was tied to each leg. "So what do you think?" she smirked after explaining her plan to sneak it into one of the boys' bunks and making it crawl along the bed. Then when they woke up, they would jump back into their own beds and pretend to wake up. It would be completely safe, it would just give them a good scare, as payback.

"Who should our victim be?" she added mischievously.

"Definitely Squid, for multiple reasons," Lauren explained. "First of all, this whole payback thing is his fault due to his little stunt at dinner." Alexis narrowed her eyes. "Secondly, his nickname is Squid. I don't like that. But the third reason, the last reason, is the most important. Squid was the first person to call me small."

Alexis nodded. "All of those points make excellent sense. Squid won't even know what hit him. Muahahaha!" she let out a burst of evil laughter.

Lauren waited patiently until she was done before asking, "So how are we going to set this up?"

"We need to wait until all the guys fall asleep first, and then we put the lizard into Squid's bed. Then we put a bunch of stuff in our own beds to make it look like we're still asleep, and then we wait for the morning," Alexis grinned in eager anticipation. "When he wakes up, we pull the strings a bit, make the lizard jump at people, and in the ensuing chaos we sneak back into our beds and 'wake up'. No one will suspect a thing!"

"Sweet!" Lauren summed up in one word.

"Oh yes," Alexis agreed.

The two PICs snuck back into the tent and peered inside. The guys were just lying down in their beds, and Alexis sighed. She sat down outside the tent just outside the entrance. "This may take a while…" Lauren sat down beside her and the two waited in silence as it got steadily darker in the camp. Finally, Alexis looked back into the tent. "Okay, let's go!"

When the two got in the tent, Alexis went to get the dead lizard and then headed straight for Squid's bed. Lauren crept over to their beds and was working on stuffing Alexis' stuff under her covers when she heard someone shift in their bed.

"Shorty? What are you doing?" Zigzag asked sleepily.

Lauren paused, but quickly her brain thought of a plan. "Ricky," she whispered, trying to sound mysterious and ghostly. "You're just having a strange dream. When you wake up, you will not remember this!"

"Alright," Zigzag sighed, turning over and going back to bed.

Alexis finished with the lizard and walked over to Lauren. "Nice one," she commented as she helped her friend plump Lauren's bed. The two stood back and admired their handiwork.

"Oh this is going to be so kickass!" Alexis giggled. "All that's left is…"

"To wait," Lauren finished her sentence.

The next morning, at precisely 4:00AM, the morning trumpet sounded, signaling the campers that it was time to get up. Squid stretched and his hand brushed against something. Confused, he grabbed it and his eyes widened. "LIZARD!!!" he screamed, jumping out of bed. The lizard jumped after him, landing on his head. He screamed again and brushed it off, right onto Caveman's bed.

The first thing Caveman saw when he woke up was a yellow-spotted lizard staring at him. He let out an ear-splitting shriek and threw it off. By now everyone in the room was awake, and when X-Ray stood up the lizard hit him in the face. He yelled in shock as it dropped to the ground and seemingly scurried away under Alexis' bed.

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT!" Squid yelled. "Did you see that?!"

"Dude, we could have been killed!" X-Ray exclaimed.

Zero was the first one to notice that the girls weren't awake yet. Then Armpit noticed.

"Guys! The girls aren't up!" he whispered fearfully. "What if the lizard bit 'em? What if they're—dead?"

The guys stared at the two beds. When neither Lauren or Alexis moved, Zero moved forwards and poked the lump that was on Alexis' bed. He jumped back when Alexis rolled over and yawned.

"Good morning, Zero!"

He looked startled. Alexis grinned and chucked her pillow at Lauren, who flinched as it made contact with her face.

Alexis got to her feet sleepily. "Sup guys?" she greeted cheerfully as she began walking towards the flap of the tent. She managed to get one foot on the ground when half a dozen "NOOOOO!!!!!"'s reached her ears and X-Ray and Squid were pushing her back, pinning her down on her bed. Zigzag was standing by Lauren now, holding her back.

"What the hell?!" Lauren's muffled yell was heard from behind his back.

"Yellow-spotted lizard!" Caveman whispered, frantically.

"Oh…" Alexis nodded slowly, winking at Lauren and shoving the two guys off of her. She quickly dodged towards the lizard, with its head poking out from the side of her bed, picked it up by the neck and tossed it to Lauren. She caught it with a grin, as though it was a football, and tossed it back to Alexis. There were several girlish wails from the boys. "Hey, Squid! Heads up!" she grinned and threw it towards him. He ducked and the lizard dropped to the floor.

"Are you fucking crazy?!" Armpit cried in frantic disbelief.

Lauren rolled her eyes with Alexis and clapped him behind the head. "It's fake!" she scolded him. The boys looked confused for a moment. The pause was broken as Zero slowly walked towards the lizard and examined it. It looked like he was fighting a laugh.

"Well… THAT was exhilarating," he mused after a moment, tossing it to Caveman. Caveman moved it around in his hands and chuckled.

"You could say that again."

X-Ray grinned and took the lizard, chucking it back and forth between himself and Zigzag.

"Fooled by girls. I feel so betrayed," he sighed playfully, elbowing Lauren.

Alexis and Lauren grinned and turned to Squid who still hadn't said anything yet. "Well?" Lauren raised an eyebrow. "What have you learned today…" Alexis drawled like an elementary school teacher.

"Don't mess with girls," he replied grudgingly, although he too was fighting off a grin.

Mr. Sir appeared in the doorway, looking angry. "Let's go, you girl scouts!" he shouted at them, spitting sunflower seeds all over the place. "Time to go dig a hole!"


	5. Chapter 5: First Hole's the Hardest

Chapter Five: First Hole's The Hardest

He led the D-Tent to the 'Library' where all the shovels were held. He handed them out, X-Ray switched with Zigzag, they all grabbed honey-coated tortillas (the girls stared at them in disgust) and they headed out.

After a few minutes Lauren fell behind. She tried as hard as she could to keep up, but the guys were used to the sand and were walking too fast. "Guys!" she whined. "Please don't walk so fast! I can't keep up!"

Zigzag walked over to her and smiled. "Here, Shorty, I'll give you a piggyback. Hop on."

Lauren looked unsure. "I don't know… are you sure?"

He nodded in response. Lauren jumped up onto his back, and Alexis walked back and grabbed her shovel. Lauren poked Zigzag's puffy hair. "Holy crap, Ziggy!" she exclaimed. "Your hair is so soft!"

Alexis had to work hard to keep a straight face as she passed them and went to catch up to the others.

"So… what's with your name?" Alexis asked casually to Mr. Sir who narrowed his eyes to black little slits. He apparently wasn't used to being treated with such disrespect.

"My name is what you call me and that is that," he replied, seemingly hostile.

Alexis shrugged and glanced over to the guys who were all trying very hard to contain their amusement. "It's just that… Mr. Sir… that can't be your real name… ooh! You were given one of those really queer names weren't you! Like Quinn Pigmy or Voldepants Dorkio or Willis LeBatman right?"

Mr. Sir grunted and stopped in his tacks. "This is where you dig," he said through gritted teeth. "5ft deep and 5ft wide. Once you're finished, the rest of the day is yours." Alexis rolled her eyes tiredly as he spat on the ground and stalked off. The other guys went off in different directions, but Zero stayed by her side for an extra moment.

"Hey, if you find anything interesting, you're supposed to show it to the warden. If she likes it, you get the day off," he half-smiled and shrugged, trying to portray some 'silver lining.'

Alexis smiled in response and drove the shovel into the ground. She grinned in success as the metal blade completely submerged into the dry soil. But when she tried to push the shovel outwards to scoop up the thick dirt, it would not budge an inch.

"Oh, BRILLIANT!" Alexis exclaimed angrily. Using all of her body strength, she rested her feet on the edges of the blade that were sticking out a couple inches or so, and clamped both hands on the wooden handle. She pulled backwards, using momentum to try and release the shovel.

Suddenly feeling the release, she fell backwards hard against the sand on her back, the handle still clenched in one of her hands, and let out a small shriek of surprise.

Alexis slowly lifted her head and saw that the blade was still etched in the ground, making her shovel split in two. "You've GOT to be KIDDING me!" she cried out indignantly. "Well isn't this just MAGICAL!"

The sound of laughter rang to her ears as she saw Zigzag, who had just arrived with Lauren, standing a small distance away.

"Don't worry, the first hole is the hardest," Zero sympathized, reaching out for her hand to help her up. The ghost of a grin was on his face as she willingly took his hand and got to her feet. Somehow, he had already managed to dig about a foot deep in his whole.

Lauren tried to drive her shovel into the ground, but it just bounced away. "What the hell?" she muttered, trying again. The shovel sunk an inch into the ground and wouldn't move. Lauren pulled the shovel out of the ground and started beating it against the sand. "You… stupid… bloody… shovel… why… won't… you… dig?!" Finally she threw the shovel away and sat down angrily on the ground. "Well, screw this!"

Alexis was working furiously to widen her five-inch-deep hole, after managing to fix her shovel with a shit load of duct tape. "Come on, Shorty!" she shouted over her shoulder. "Don't give up! It's actually not that hard once you get started!"

Lauren looked over at the guys, who had dug a considerable amount already. Even Armpit's hole was pretty big. "Show offs," she muttered and went back to digging.

She picked up her shovel again, but this time she placed the tip of the blade on the ground and jumped on it. It sunk into the ground and she pulled out a chunk of dirt. She threw it away and grinned. "Hey! HEY! I'm getting it!" she repeated that step again until her whole was a little bigger. "AHA!"

Zero rolled his eyes at Alexis who grinned back at him. His hole was almost reaching 2ft. Alexis looked at him in awe. "Dude…"

The day continued, and it kept getting hotter. Everyone had removed the top half of their jumpsuit to reveal their T-Shirts underneath. Lauren looked up and saw a truck with a water tank on it coming towards them.

"Lunch," came a voice from above the hole. She squinted up at Zigzag and Armpit, who were waiting patiently. "You coming, Shorty?"

Alexis glared down at her 3ft hole. It was getting deep, but it was no more than half a foot to a foot wide. "I'll be back…" she muttered darkly before shoving the shovel into the ground at an angle where it would stay upright. She turned around to see Zero, Squid and Caveman waiting for her. "Hey Kitty-Cat, hurry up!" Squid called over in her direction.

"Kitty-Cat?" Alexis questioned, arching an eyebrow as she wrapped her hair over her left shoulder to get it off her back. She desperately wished she had a hair tie with her.

Caveman smirked. "They thought it fit," he shrugged.

Alexis nodded slowly before turning to Lauren. "Hah! I got Kitty-Cat and you got Shorty!" she chuckled before ducking a punch from Lauren, directed at her face. The guys laughed.

"I quite like my nickname," Lauren defended herself. "Besides, it's a sign that I've been accepted into their lives, and the fact that I got mine first just means that they respect me more than they respect you," she finished by immaturely sticking out her tongue.

"Oh… that hurt," Alexis frowned, pretending to start crying.

"Let's go girl scouts!" Mr. Sir yelled, slamming the door of his truck for emphasis. The guys lined up: X-Ray, Armpit, Zigzag, Squid, Caveman, and Zero. Lauren went to go to the back, but Zigzag grabbed her arm and pulled her between him and Squid.

"This is your spot in line, Shorty."

Lauren beamed up at him. "You're like the cool, tall, puffy-haired brother that I never had!"

Alexis chose to stay at the back of the line with Zero.

"So, how did your first morning of digging go?" Mr. Sir directed the question at the girls as he began to fill X-Ray's canteen.

Lauren looked down at her hands, which were red and blistering. She looked back at Alexis' whose were much the same.

"Wonderful, actually," Alexis rolled her eyes sarcastically. "It was my greatest goal in life to dig holes all day in the hot sun for a year and a half. This is my dream come true, I heart Camp Green Lake!" A few of the boys snickered.

Mr. Sir looked over at her. "Still haven't lost your sense of humor, I see," he said as he grabbed Armpit's canteen. "As I said before, give it a few days and it'll disappear."

"You didn't say that, you plagiarizer!" Lauren pointed out. "That was one of the guards on the bus!"

Mr. Sir stopped filling canteens and stared at her. He spit out a few sunflower seeds and smiled. "For that smart remark, Shorty," he drawled, putting extra emphasis on her nickname, "I won't be filling your canteen today. Take a step out of line."

"You can't do that!" X-Ray yelled.

"Yeah, man, it's her first day here, give the chick some slack!" Zigzag shouted.

Mr. Sir just shrugged. "No. She needs to learn when to keep her mouth shut and not say stupid things. Take a step out of line." He spat more sunflower shells, filled Armpit's canteen and shoved it back at him. "Next."

Lauren walked back to her hole and jumped into it. She picked up her shovel and smashed it against the side of her hole, which needed to be expanded. "That… stupid… bloody… washed up… cowboy!" she said with every hit, imagining that she was smashing up Mr. Sir's head. Suddenly the sun was blocked out and Lauren looked up to see who was causing the shadows.

"Hey, you're gonna need this," Alexis tossed her canteen down to her friend, and then climbed into her hole. "Man, what an asshole." Lauren nodded as she took a long gulp of water, then handed it back.

"I can't drink it all, you need it too," she pointed out.

"Don't worry about it," Alexis grinned as she climbed back out of the hole. "I had an extra water bottle I filled up while he was getting back in his truck. He should really be more careful," she smirked.

"We're going to get him back, right?" Lauren clarified.

"News from the file marked 'Duh'!" Alexis scoffed before climbing out of her friends' hole.

Dropping into her own hole, Alexis examined the sides of the newly forming crater and began to chip at them.

Zero was the first person to finish his hole. He spat in it, then walked over to see how Alexis was doing. Her hole was around 4ft deep and was reaching about 2.5-3ft wide. "The first hole is the hardest," he repeated what he'd said earlier.

Alexis nodded as she took a sip from her water bottle. "How's Shorty doing?"

"OH! MY! **GOD!**" Lauren's shout rang out from her hole. "What the hell?! NOOOOO!!!"

Alexis ran over with Zero, Zigzag and Squid (requiring a bit of assistance out of her hole) to see what problem Lauren had encountered now.

Lauren's shovel was stuck in the side in the side of her hole, and there was a large pile of dirt in her hole. She glared deathly at it. "Cave. In. The stupid dirt slid in when I hit it. Ah God DAMNIT!" Lauren sat down in her hole and crossed her arms. "I hate this place!"

"And we could've gotten jail," Alexis sighed. "Well, we still have a year, 5 months and 29.5 days left to go, so don't get sick of it yet." Lauren grumbled something incoherent under her breath.

It was 4:45 by the time Alexis and Lauren finished digging. Alexis managed to get out of her hole, using her shovel as a sort of ice axe in the crusted dirt to pull herself out, but she had to lean on Zero the entire way back to camp. Lauren, however, had to be pulled out of her hole, and Zigzag gave her a piggyback to the tent. She and Alexis dropped into their beds, completely exhausted.

"We are so going to die here!" Lauren moaned.

"I can't feel my legs, my arms, my hands, my teeth, my hair, or my clavicles…" Alexis complained.

Caveman poked his head into the tent. "You guys are officially the slowest diggers in the camp," he grinned. "You're even slower than I was when I first arrived!"

Alexis's head snapped up, revealing a deadly expression. "Go screw yourself with a hot potato!" she yelled.

He chuckled. "It's supper time, and then we're going to go shower," Caveman pointed out. "You guys need to keep up your strength."

"Oh, like hell we do," Alexis muttered, pulling herself unwillingly into a sitting position. She shrugged out of her orange jumpsuit, leaving herself in a pair of light blue jeans and a large baggy T-Shirt that had once belonged to her brother-in-law, Mitch. "I'll get dinner later, I wanna shower first," she declared, grabbing her bag and exited the tent, half dragging herself towards the girls' bathroom.


	6. Chapter 6: Teasing and Recoveries

_Blagh. I'm not all too happy with this chapter, but my friend insisted we have something like this come up, so ta-da! Don't forget to review! Thanks! _

Chapter Six: Teasing and Recoveries

She only got 5 minutes of water, but that was all she needed. The cold water felt excellent against her skin after being out in the hot sun all day—although she desperately wished for the soothing hot water to warm up her muscles after digging all day.

When she got back to the tent, roughly twenty minutes after she left, she had changed into a pair of darker jean, a black tank-top and a white sweater that was only zipped up halfway. She was running a brush through her almost-dry hair when she noticed Lauren still lying on her bed with her eyes closed.

"Lauren?" she asked quietly, shoving her bag into the trunk at the end of the cot and sitting down beside her friend's limp body. "Are you dead?" she cocked an eyebrow.

"I don't think I can move…" Lauren moaned.

Alexis nodded and sighed. "Come on, Lauren, let's get some food in you before you pass out," she mumbled, grabbing Lauren's arms and pulling her to her feet. Slowly, they made their way to the mess hall. Alexis sat Lauren between Zigzag and Armpit where they made sure she didn't lose consciousness, while she went and got their dinners.

"Well… at least it's not beans again," Alexis sighed, trying to hide her disgust as she sat down across from Lauren, between Zero and Squid, and handed the supposed "chicken stew" in front of her friend.

She sat, poking and nibbling at her dinner slowly, trying to savor the broth in her dry mouth, while Lauren began devouring hers with Zigzag constantly reminding her to pace herself.

Trying to take her mind off of exhaustion, she turned to Zero and began to make conversation.

"So how did you end up here?" she asked quietly, finding that her throat was pissed off at her for not getting as hydrated as it should have been.

Zero sighed. "I've actually been here twice," he replied with the same volume. "First time I got myself and Caveman here by stealing a pair of Clyde Livingston's shoes. Long story," Alexis nodded her understanding. "And the second time, just a month ago—not long after I got out—I dug a hole in the middle of a park," he finished turning to look at her. "And when the cops found me and tried to fine me, I hit him over the shovel and ran. Needless to say, they ended up catching me."

Alexis was mildly confused by this. "Did they give you the same sort of choice they gave us? Jail or the camp?"

He nodded slowly after a moment.

"Then why the hell would you want to come back to this hellhole?! This is like a thousand times worse than jail," Alexis mumbled, taking a bite of the stew. Zero did the same with his.

"It just… felt right, I guess," he shrugged after swallowing. "I like digging holes."

_But why the hell would he want to dig holes here? _Alexis thought to herself, but she nodded anyways_. _

"So, do you regret coming back to Camp Green Lake?" she asked after a moment. Zero turned to look at her, the corners of his mouth tugged upwards.

"Do YOU regret coming here?" he turned the question around on her, cocking his head to the side.

Alexis thought carefully. "Nope," she grinned after a few seconds. The two started laughing, without really knowing why.

She turned to face the others when she realized that the hall was nearly empty. Zigzag had Lauren slumped over his shoulders, and X-Ray and Armpit were holding the door for him.

"Hey, you two coming?" Squid called back to Zero and Alexis. She narrowed her eyes as she saw Zigzag leaning over and mumbling something to the other guys who in turn all burst out laughing. The door closed behind them as they left without saying another word.

"We'd better go catch up to them," Zero said after they were gone. "Trust me. They gossip more than high school cheerleaders."

Alexis laughed along as they got to their feet and chased after the others. When they finally caught up to them, they were in the rec. room. X-Ray and Squid were smirking as they entered, playing foosball on a beat-up, and dirty looking table. Armpit and Caveman were trying not to look up as they pretended to watch something on the broken TV, and Zigzag was sitting on the couch with Magnet with Lauren curled up into a ball next to Zigzag, apparently sleeping, but her eyes fluttered open as the two entered.

"So how ya feeling?" Alexis asked, plopping herself down next to Lauren on the couch.

"Like crap," Lauren moaned. "Trying to dig a hole in the blazing sun with almost no water? Well, I don't think it's the best thing to do." She clutched her stomach. "And I think I ate too fast…"

"See? I told you to pace yourself," Zigzag exclaimed. "Now you've probably made yourself sick and won't be able to dig tomorrow… not that the warden or Mr. Sir will care. Now I'll have to carry you back to the tent, won't I?"

"I can walk!" Lauren objected as she moved into a sitting position. "Just you watch!" Alexis and the guys watched with amusement as Lauren pulled herself to her feet and stumbled to the door. "See?" she called from the doorway. "I'm perfectly fine! I'll see you back in the tent, I'm going to go shower."

Alexis scoffed. "Ten bucks says we find her collapsed somewhere in the camp."

Squid, X-Ray, and Armpit walked up to Alexis after a few moments, each wearing a sly smirk. "So… Kitty," X-Ray drawled, leaning on the arm of the couch. "What's the deal with you and Zero?" he nodded his head towards Zero was sitting on the other side of the couch.

Squid sandwiched himself between the two and rested his arms on the back of the couch on either side. "Yeah, you've been getting pretty friendly lately, we've noticed…"

Alexis narrowed her eyes at them. She cleared her throat, "I know you're not implying that there's something going on between us," she stated clearly.

"Actually, we are," Armpit grinned.

She noticed out of the corner of her eye that Zero was glaring maliciously at them; his hands balled into tight little fists, and were avoiding their direct gaze. A moment later she realized that she was doing the same thing. Struggling greatly, she fought the urge to punch them all in the face.

"Okay, A) Why do you care? B) I believe I've been treating you all equally… relatively… C) Go blow a donkey. D) I'm going to go make sure Shorty didn't build and fall off a God damned cliff!" she listed, getting angrier and angrier because the more she ticked off, the more joyful their idiotic grins got, and the louder she became.

Growling to herself, she stalked out of the rec. room, passing Lauren who was lying face-down in the sand about 2ft away from the door, and off towards the D-Tent. Once inside, Alexis fell down on her bed and began screaming into her pillow as loud as she could, thrashing violently, until she felt light-headed and dizzy. Suddenly a calm, quiet voice echoed through the vacant tent.

"Kitty?"

Alexis froze as Lauren and Zigzag entered the tent. "What?" she snapped, sitting up and crossing her sore legs. Zigzag seemed both confused and slightly amused at the same time.

"I heard Shorty moaning outside and thought I'd help her back to the tent. Then I heard you screaming," he smirked, somewhat sympathetically, taking a seat on the edge of Alexis' cot. "So what's up?"

"Just the whole work picking on me," Alexis sighed.

Zigzag nodded. "I can relate to that, trust me. The guys can be pretty nasty when they feel like it."

There was an awkward silence, which was broken with Squid, X-Ray and the rest of the D-Tent walked in.

"Hey, Kitty," X-Ray began unsurely. "We're uh… we're um, really sorry. Like, really…"

"Yeah," Squid added. "We shouldn't have said anything… it was uh… rude and um, disrespectful… I think…"

Lauren had to slap a hand over her mouth to prevent her laugh from escaping.

"Well, I don't accept your apology," Alexis said irritably.

X-Ray and Squid sighed and went to sit down on either side of her. She folded her arms stubbornly as they playfully mussed her hair. "Come on, Kitty, you know we didn't really mean it like that," Squid attempted, pulling his face into a puppy-dog pout. Although she was trying to be mad at them, she had to avoid his gaze and focus on not laughing. The guys seemed to sense her defense breaking down.

"We was just playin, you know. There aren't exactly a lot of girls down here," X-Ray contributed, punching her lightly in the arm. Alexis bit down on her lip, forcing the smile down.

"She's going to cave," Caveman grinned matter-of-factly.

Zigzag grinned and scoffed. "Going to? Please, she's already caving."

"Wait for it," Squid drawled slowly, his eyes wide. "Wait… and…"

"She caved!" The entire tent roared as Alexis had to bury her face in her hands to hide her laughter. A few minutes later after most of the tent had composed themselves, she lifted her deep-red face from her hands.

"Well how the hell am I supposed to be mad at you when you guys do that?! That's just unfair!" Alexis complained, the ghost of a grin still on her face. "Stupid skanky cheaters."

X-Ray clapped her on the shoulder. "But that's the only way we can win," he teased. "We couldn't under regular circumstances."

"Yeah, you're too smart for that," Squid chimed in.

Alexis turned to Lauren, a playfully superior grin on her face. "Has anyone ever told you that you're smart?" she mocked. "I didn't think so. Looks like they actually like me a lot better than they like you. And how does that make you feel?"

"Oh sure, sure, mock me while I can't defend myself," Lauren sighed sarcastically. "Why doesn't everyone just make fun of poor old me, while I can't beat the crap out of them or reply with a blistering and scathing comeback because I'm just too damn tired." She let out a dramatic groan and placed her hand on her forehead. "Woe is me."

"Have you even had a shower yet?" Alexis asked, changing the subject.

"No, considering I'm physically incapable of getting there," Lauren explained patiently. "How many times have I had to say that?" she shook her head at her friends' apparent memory loss.

"How are you going to dig a hole tomorrow?" Magnet asked, concerned.

"Oh, I don't know," Lauren said vaguely, putting her hands under her head. "A good night's sleep has been said to do wonders. Or maybe I just won't dig…" Everyone stared at her, and then burst out laughing. Lauren sat up in her bed. "What! What's so funny?"

"Kay, uh, Shorty, if you don't dig Mr. Sir will come and beat you with your own shovel," Armpit laughed, although you could tell that he wasn't kidding.

"Yeah, I don't really think we have much of a choice whether we dig or not," Alexis sighed. The room grew quiet slowly.

"Well," Alexis got to her feet and grabbed Lauren's bag. "Maybe you'll feel better after you have a shower. Come on," Tossing Lauren's backpack over her shoulder, she grabbed arms and helped her get to her feet. She dropped the bag by the shower stall and leaned Lauren safely against the wall where she wouldn't fall over, and went back to the tent where the guys were already ready for bed.

Too exhausted to bother changing, Alexis flopped down on the bed, curled up into a little ball and closed her eyes. She was asleep within seconds, so she never noticed Lauren entering the tent, seemingly back to her relatively normal state, or Zero coming inside once everyone else was already asleep.

_So who's liking the Zero/Kitty thing? Hmm? I won't know unless you COMMENT ON IT! Please and thankies!_


	7. Chapter 7: Brilliant Plan

Chapter Seven: Brilliant Plan

"Come on, Kitty-Cat! Wake up!"

Alexis heard the muffled voices, but only barely. Her eyes remained closed as she rolled over on to her stomach, hands acting as a pillow, folded under her head. "Back off bitch," she muttered subconsciously. "I'm Rick James, bitch. Want me to pop da cap in yo ass…" she was only remotely aware of the confused silence that followed.

"Hmm. Let's try this."

Suddenly she felt a pair of hands poking either of her sides. Reflexively squealing, she curled into a little ball and attempted to roll over, but instead managed to fall off the bed. The sound of chuckling reached her ears.

Unwillingly, Alexis opened her eyes to see X-Ray, Squid, Zigzag and Caveman standing around her bed, mildly amused.

"Oh look, she actually is alive," Squid exclaimed, pulling her to her feet. It took her a moment to gain her balance and had to lean against him for a few moments until she was stable.

"Come on, Kitty, we gotta go," Zigzag called, moving over towards Lauren's bed with Caveman. "Armpit, Magnet and Zero left to go distract Mr. Sir; if he sees you guys sleeping in there'll be hell to pay."

Alexis groaned as she checked her wristwatch. Apparently 4:45 was considered to be 'sleeping in.'

"Come on, Shorty," Zigzag cooed, shaking Lauren's shoulder slightly. "Guys, she won't wake up," he sighed, concerned.

"Like hell she won't," Alexis muttered tiredly and crossed over to Lauren's bed. She knelt down beside where Lauren's head was resting on her pillow and leaned in slowly.

"EEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" she squealed as loud as she possibly could into Lauren's ear.

The guys couldn't help but laugh as Lauren screamed, "NOT THE RELISH!" and jumped about a foot in the air, batting blindly at the air.

"Good morning, Sleepyhead!" Caveman grinned cheerfully.

Lauren moaned and tried to bury her head under her pillow. "You guys suck SO much!" Zigzag and Alexis each grabbed one of her legs and forcibly began pulling her out of bed. "Nooo!" Lauren yelled. "Leave me alone, you bastards! Let me sleep!" The two kept pulling and eventually she fell to the floor.

"The earliest mole digs the deepest hole," Zigzag grinned, quoting Mr. Sir. Lauren pulled herself off the floor and followed the guys and Alexis out of the tent. They met up with Zero, Magnet and Armpit, who looked relieved.

"Dude, Mr. Sir was just about to go looking for you," Armpit exclaimed.

"Why the hell would he do that?" Alexis said with a grin. "We've been here the whole time."

The group grabbed their breakfast, (which, much to Lauren's dismay, was honey-covered tortillas again) and headed out on the lake. Lauren picked at the blisters on her hands. "Eww…" she sighed.

Alexis exhaled sharply a she began to trace the edges of her soon-to-be-hole, planning out how far she'd have to dig. She didn't realize that most of her strength had left her until she tried to stab the blade into the ground like she had done yesterday, only to find that it didn't even scar the top of the sand. "Oh, son of a—" she cried out as the shovel bounced back and managed to punch her in the face, causing her to tumble backwards to the ground.

X-Ray, Zero and Squid gathered around her looking mostly sympathetic, but they also seemed to be trying to swallow their grins.

"The second hole is the hardest," Zero sighed as the three helped her back up.

"Oi! You lied to me!" Alexis exclaimed, struggling to stand without requiring assistance. "You told me the first hole was the hardest!"

"Oh, he's just trying to be considerate," Squid smirked, as though he wanted to say something else. "Don't give the boy a hard time."

Lauren was having a similarly hard time starting her hole. The ground was hard and unyielding, and her shovel bounced off the ground like a rubber ball. "What the hell?" she murmured, striking at the ground again. Her shovel stuck in a tiny crack, and she shoveled the dirt away. She looked over at Alexis, who was being helped off the ground.

"Things not going too well?" she called as she moved another shovel of dirt.

"Shut up!" Alexis said irritably as she pushed the guys away. She picked up her shovel with chagrin. "I'm doing just fine!" Lauren shook her head at her friends' denial and turned back to her own hole.

By the time lunch came around, Lauren was feeling faint. She watched as the water truck drove up, and this time Mom jumped out. "Let's go gentlemen… and ladies!" he shouted. Everyone climbed out of their holes, and when Lauren got in line she had to grin.

"Yay! I'm getting water today!"

Alexis smiled, getting in line behind Zero. "There go you Ricky… Alan… Theodore… Lauren…" Mr. Pendanski listed as he filled their canteens. "Zero… and Alexis." Once he was finished, he got back into the water truck and drove off cheerfully.

Alexis paused, choosing to save her water instead of taking a huge gulp like several others around her were doing. "So… why do they all call you Zero?" she asked slowly. "Even Mom calls you that, and he calls everyone else by their actual name…"

He shrugged it off. "They didn't have any records of my name when I came here, I guess…"

"Huh… So what is your real name, then?" she nearly smirked. "Bob? Bill? Rumple Stilztkin?" He looked thoroughly confused by her last guess. She just shook her head, "Never mind."

He nodded slowly, half smiling as they sat down between their holes to take a short break from digging. Zero's hole was already 4' x 3.5" while Alexis' was barely a foot deep, 5ft wide.

"Anyways, my real name is Hector," he added after a moment, taking a sip of water.

"Well that's a nice name!" Alexis exclaimed. He chuckled softly.

"Well, I've heard better," he sighed, feigning nonchalance.

Alexis laughed, inconspicuously flipping off X-Ray, Squid and Armpit when she noticed they were smirking at them and whispering about something.

"So where are you from?" Zero continued after a few moments.

"Winnipeg," Alexis stated casually, but her expression changed when she saw his face. His eyes went somewhat wide and he had looked as though a light bulb just flicked on as he found the last missing piece of a puzzle.

"I thought you looked familiar…" he muttered, mostly to himself, softly.

"Huh?" Alexis cocked her head to the side in confusion.

Zero looked down. "When you were about six or seven… did you live in a blue and grey side-by-side on Stewart St.?" he asked slowly.

"Yeah…" Alexis answered in the same pace. "How did you know?"

He was quiet for nearly a minute. "You know the Isbister park—across the street from that house?" he started. "I lived there until I was eight. I think it was just a few weeks after your family moved…" his voice was reluctant, as if he was unsure whether or not he should have brought it up at all.

A moment later, a little light bulb dinged over her own head.

"Oh! Now I remember!" she exclaimed. "Whenever I went to that park, we always saw you over by the pond…" her voice trailed off as childhood memories came flooding back to her.

"Not to be a nag," Zigzag's voice came from behind them, causing both to flinch. "But if Mr. Sir comes and sees you guys not digging, he'll toss you into a hole filled with yellow-spotted lizards."

Alexis sighed, examining her hole as the two slowly crawled back to the half-finished craters in the sand. Suddenly, someone turned on another light bulb.

Using her feet, in a couple of minutes she managed to pull the metal blade off of the long wooden pole-like handle. Again. She drove the blade into the center of her hole and grinned, as she compared the height of her blade to the depth of her hole. They were the same.

"Problem solved," she grinned and shrugged. "I'm done!"

Feeling her muscles tightening on her, she dropped down on the sand lying on her back with her hands behind her head.

Zero and Zigzag gaped at her. Alexis just smiled up at them and closed her eyes, preparing herself for a nice nap. Zero's voice broke her out of her relaxation.

"Kitty… you can't do that!"

Alexis opened her eyes slightly.

"If Mr. Sir or the warden ever found out that you did that, you'd be in so much trouble!"

She huffed. "Do you ever actually see either of them come out to check the holes we dig?" she asked pointedly. "They automatically assume that your holes will get dug because everyone here is afraid of punishment. So, if I skip out on digging one or two holes here and there," she grinned and stretched into a more comfortable position, "I should be fine."

"Dude…" Zigzag exclaimed. "Why the hell didn't WE ever think of that?!" he ran off to share the news with the others, and Alexis smiled up at Zero.

"If everyone in the camp just refused to dig, there wouldn't really be anything the instructors could do about it," she pointed out.

"Yeah, except for sending us to jail instead." Alexis and Zero whirled around to find Squid standing there, arms crossed over his shovel. "We're here so that we don't get thrown in prison, and if we don't do what the instructors tell us, guess where we'll be heading." He nodded a gesture towards Alexis. "And you'll be going there as well, if you don't dig your hole."

"My God! What a brilliant plan!" Lauren exclaimed. "Nice one, Kitty!" The rest of the D-Tent had been silent as Zigzag explained this to them, and now they exchanged an uneasy glance. Lauren saw it and frowned. "Guys, what the hell is your problem. Do you WANT to dig holes all day for the rest of your lives?"

X-Ray cleared his throat. "Look, Shorty, it's Camp Green Lake or prison," he said bluntly, voicing the same concern as Squid. "If we piss off the people in charge, we'll get sent to jail, the place we're all trying to avoid. Get it?"

Alexis sat up slowly. "Alright. For the record, in jail, you get to socialize with your other cellmates, you go outside in the courtyard for about two hours everyday, you get two meals a day, and you get the opportunity to visit people from the outside. Yeah, prison has changed a bit in the past half a decade or so, boys," she explained quickly. "Here, we're forced to wake up way before the sun, are forced to dig holes in the blazing sun with little water which pretty much traumatizes us, and then we socialize if we have enough strength. Is there really much of a difference?"

Lauren shook her head. "And besides, they never even bother to come check our holes anyways. As long as we don't go back to the camp too early, and we at least look like we're doing something when they fill our canteens at lunch, they won't suspect a thing!" she grinned proudly.

There was a pause of tension among the D-Tent boys.

"Guys… the girls' kinda got a point," Caveman pointed out, breaking the silence. His brow was furrowed in deep concentration. "They don't check the holes to make sure we dig. And even if they did, they don't keep track of who digs where."

"Yeah!" Zigzag exclaimed. "We don't have assigned areas or anything; we could always just blame it on one of those digusting B-Tent bastards!"

"That's the spirit!" Alexis clapped him on the back.

It now seemed like Squid and X-Ray were the only ones against the idea, and Squid seemed close to caving. Alexis decided to take advantage of the situation.

"Come on…" she cooed, walking over to Squid. "You've been here for years and haven't taken a day off at all! It's not like we're going to get caught or anything, and just look at my hands!" She pulled her face into an irresistible puppy-dog pout. His eyes widened as he realized what she was doing, and he couldn't help but examine her small hands, which were covered in blisters and blood; they almost looked crippled. "I think they're getting infected… I'm gonna have to cut them off soon, I'll bet. Us girls don't have big, strong hands like you guys…Do you want to see me start crying?" she finished, widening her eyes and dipping her head as if she was actually starting to cry.

Squid only held her pitiful gaze for about 2.74 seconds before looking over her head to X-Ray. "Okay, they may play even dirtier than we do, but they are right," he nearly pleaded. He spun her around to face X-Ray, his hands on her shoulders, and dipped his own head. "Come on, dude, look at them! Have you no heart?!"

Alexis held her expression for X-Ray.

He finally sighed. "Look guys, not today, alright? Our holes are already almost finished. We can skip out on tomorrow and have the day off. Fair?"

Alexis and Lauren grinned, and clapped excitedly. Alexis practically threw herself at X-Ray, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Fair enough!" The girls exclaimed. X-Ray returned the hug for a moment before Alexis dropped her arms and began dancing her victory dance with Shorty.

"Just finish your holes," he smirked, picking up his shovel and walking back to finish his hole. The others followed his lead.

Alexis sighed, but reattached her shovel with her handy-dandy duct tape, and continued digging. A few minutes later she noticed something silver sticking out of the bottom of her hole.

"Hubba-wa?" she exclaimed quietly, putting it out of the sand and brushing it off. It appeared to be the cap of a tube of lipstick. There were initials at the top, but she couldn't make them out.

"Hey guys," she called out after a moment. "I think I found something…"


	8. Chapter 8: Lipstick and Lizards

Chapter Eight: Lipstick and Lizards

Everyone crowded around Alexis' hole, peering down at the small object in her hands. "What is it?" Magnet asked. "It looks like a bullet, man!"

Squid grabbed the object from Alexis and held it up to the sun. He squinted at it, scrutinizing it carefully. "Nah," he finally said, tossing it back to Alexis. "It's too narrow and to be a shotgun shell, and too long to be a regular bullet." X-Ray raised his eyebrow questioningly. "Dude, I have guns…" he admitted with a shrug.

"You guys are all idiots," Alexis huffed at them. "Silver bullet, my ass. It's a lipstick tube!"

"I'm so sorry," Magnet rolled his eyes sarcastically. "I obviously should have known that. How could I be so dense?"

Zigzag stepped forward and took it. "Hey, there are initials on this thing! Hmm… K.B." He suddenly smiled. "I know who that is! It's Keith Baranger."

"Who?" Armpit exclaimed.

"He was in my math class," Zigzag smirked.

Lauren grabbed the lipstick tube away from him. "So it's obviously his, right?" she asked sarcastically. "His lipstick just happened to wind up here in the middle of nowhere because it's just magical like that. Why would he even own lipstick? Is he a drag queen?"

Alexis exhaled sharply. "Shorty, hush. All of this pales to utter insignificance, because I really don't give a damn whose lipstick it is. In fact, I don't want to call it lipstick," she plucked the tube from Lauren's hands and tossed it in the air, catching it in front of the others. "This, gentlemen and Shorty, is a 'Get Out of Jail Free' token. Like in Monopoly."

Lauren shook her head. "Nice comparison."

"But who gets it?" Caveman asked, clearly confused.

Alexis furrowed her brow, not understanding his question. "Uh, well, the obvious answer would be to give it to the most deserving, loveable, entertaining, hard-working person here," she finished with a fake grin, but no one caught onto the hint. They stared at her, and she sighed heavily. "Dudes, seriously now. My hole, my token."

No one moved or said anything for a moment.

"Holy crap, Shorty. Mr. Sir was right. You DO forget how to use sarcasm after a while…" she gaped at Lauren, who's eyes widened.

"NOOOO!" I don't want to forget how to use sarcasm!" Lauren exclaimed. She clasped her hands over her head and started screaming, as if there were too many voices in her head that wouldn't shut up. 'If only we had a spork,' Alexis thought to herself.

"I think she's getting too much sun," Alexis heard Magnet mumble to X-Ray.

"Ugh," Alexis groaned, grabbing Lauren's arms off her head and pulling her back to reality. "Calm down, Shorty. We're not going to forget how to use sarcasm. I'll personally take it upon myself to make sure that that does not happen! Mr. Sir just underestimates our willpower because we don't carry a Y-chromosome, but we'll prove him wrong!"

Lauren nodded. "You're right! His gender discrimination must be stopped! But first—yoink!" she grinned, proud that she had managed to distract Alexis, and grabbed the tube, taking off skipping across the camp.

The guys' eyes widened in shock. A few started chuckling, and one—Alexis guessed it was Armpit—muttered, "Yo, what's a Y-chromosome? That one of them vitamins or something?"

Once her mind registered what had happened, she took off after Lauren, leaving the guys in hysterics.

"You short little skanky traitor!" Alexis called after her.

"Hey! I'm only an inch and a half shorter than you!" Lauren retorted gleefully.

After a few minutes of playing Cat and Mouse, either of them barely aware that the guys had followed and were now taking bets on who would win, Alexis had caught up to Lauren. Without thinking to watch where she was going—apparently having forgotten that there were deep holes everywhere—Alexis reached out to tackle her. Lauren, however, was able dodge out of the way just in time before falling into a random hole. Alexis, though, was not so fortunate.

"Oh sweet Germany!" Alexis had time to cry out before falling forwards. After a moment, feeling that she seemed to be suspended in the air somehow, she realized that she hadn't directly fallen into the hole. No, instead she appeared to be balancing herself along the edges of the hole. "Well this is painful…" she winced.

Just as she was about to lower herself into the crater so she could get out, Alexis looked down just in time to see a family of nearly a dozen yellow-spotted lizards below her. Her eyes widened.  
"Oh, SHIT!" she cried loudly. "These ones are actually alive and I don't have my damn shovel!" she added darkly.

"What the hell's going on?" Lauren's amused voice came from behind her. "Didn't have a good trip?"

Alexis rolled her eyes. "Oh, my trip was just delightful, thank you for asking," she replied coldly. She attempted to turn her head towards Lauren, who stood with raised, entertained eyebrows. "Ugh, Look down!" she snapped, growing impatient as she felt her back crack.

Lauren sighed, figuring that she was just being overdramatic, but obeyed anyways. The second she caught sight of the lizards, she gasped and jumped backwards, colliding with Zigzag as the boys all finally caught up to the two.

"Hey Shorty, where's the fire?" he laughed.

"Oh, uh, down there," Lauren answered. "But that's really only if a dozen yellow-spotted lizards can be symbolized as fire in this particular scenario. Basically, Kitty's going to die. Anyone got a camera?"

"Oh, thank you, Shorty. That's a very kind, loving way to phrase the situation. Good job. You should be proud," Alexis grinned sarcastically. "Come on people! My survival here is going to require bold, decisive, visionary leadership!"

Lauren suddenly snapped her fingers. "Hey! I've got a brilliant plan to save Kitty's life!" she exclaimed sarcastically, which startled most people.

Alexis exhaled mournfully. "I'm screwed. Well, it's been fun living while it lasted…"

"Squiddy and X-Ray, go over and stand by her arms. Ziggy, you stay here with me." She waited while the others followed her orders. "Okay, now, on the count of three we all lift her limbs and drag her away from the hole, thus, saving her from her impending doom!"

"Wow. Could you make this sound any more like an Indiana Jones movie?" Alexis asked to herself before looking down nervously into the pit of lizards. "Hmm… I think I remembered to keep my will dated…"

"One!" Lauren yelled. The boys crouched down. "Two!" They reached out and grabbed Alexis' wrists and ankles.

"Don't worry, Kitty," Zigzag smiled encouragingly. "We'll get you out of there."

"Somehow I highly doubt that..."

"Three!" The four campers lifted arms and legs just as a lizard leaped up towards her face. She started yelling off a stream of random curses before she landed on the hard sandy ground. The lizard sailed in a lazy arch and fell back into the hole.

"Ha HA!" Lauren yelled. "I know that my plan would work! I'm just so awesome like that, aren't I!" she turned to a stunned Alexis and grinned widely. "You're going to have to become my slave now, you owe me your LIFE!"

Alexis opened her mouth to say something, but was too winded from being slammed onto the ground that only a wheeze came out. She took a few deep breaths before trying again. "I don't owe you anything."

"Awe… that was harsh," Lauren frowned.

Alexis got to her feet after a moment. "Yes, I'm well aware of that Captain Obvious, but being attacked by families of freaking yellow-spotted lizards tends to make me a tad bit pessimistic! If you gave me a few minutes without being a bitch about it, I will thank you!"

Lauren stifled a laugh. "I only have a year and a half of my life, you know, so hurry the hell up then."

Alexis shot her a glare before staring off into space for a good fifteen seconds before blinking back to reality.

"Okay, s'all good!" she grinned, popping her collar very pimp-like. "Thank you everyone!"

Off to the side, X-Ray cocked an eyebrow before shaking his head. "Girls are weird, man," he muttered to the others.

"No kidding… I thought girls got all like… dramatic about breaking a nail, letting alone almost dieing…" Squid contemplated aloud.

"Maybe it's just them?" Zigzag shrugged, jokingly.

Alexis looked over at Lauren and realized that she still had the object that had started the whole mess: her "Get Out of Jail Free" token.

"Yoink!" she yelped, plucking the tube away from Lauren. "For the simple fact that I almost died thanks to you, I vote that this tube should belong to me, to be used at my discretion. She stared at Lauren, waiting for a response.

"Okay…" Lauren sighed in defeat.

Grinning, the five walked back to their holes. It was nearly 3:00 by now so most had finished their holes.

"Hey guys… can you help me?" Alexis looked around the holey landscape. "I can't seem to find my hole…" The guys' heads whipped around so fast that they almost lost their balance, clearly misunderstanding. She rolled her eyes. "No, no. I'm quite sure I know where THAT hole is. I'm talking about the hole I was digging in the sand," she explained. "It was only like a foot or so deep, 5ft wide. It was somewhere around here though cause it was next to Shorty's…" her eyes easily found Lauren's hole.

Lauren nodded, mildly confused. "Yeah, yours was right over there…" Lauren picked up her shovel and pointed towards the hole that was roughly ten paces away. But it was already finished neatly.

"Uh… I'm confused…" Alexis frowned in thought.

Suddenly they spotted Armpit and Magnet starting to walk back towards the camp.

"Yo, guys!" Squid called to the two. "Do you remember where Kitty was digging?"

The two grinned. "Yeah. After they left, Zero finished his hole and then moved onto hers," Magnet answered.

Alexis and Lauren stared down at the finished hole. A shovel was inside it, propped up against the wall. The whole was exactly 5ft deep, and Alexis already knew it was the right width.

"But—why the hell would he do this?" she frowned, puzzled. "I wasn't going to dig today, and he shouldn't have done it for me." She looked around. "Awe… that means he had to dig two holes today. I barely survived doing one yesterday…"

Lauren climbed down into her own hole with a sigh. "It was about 4ft deep and 4.5ft wide. "Couldn't he have finished mine too?" she complained, digging her shovel into the side of the hole. "I mean, look at it. It probably would have taken him four minutes to do."

"Yeah, but it should only take you like twenty," X-Ray pointed out.

Lauren glared up at him. "It still would have saved me that time," she snapped back, moving another shovel of dirt. "That kid is seriously like a mole or something."

"Or he could just be a misunderstood kid," Alexis suggested innocently. When Lauren glared up at her, she smiled. "Maybe he just knew who needed more help with their hole?"

Lauren stuck the blade into the sand and scoffed knowingly. "Yeah. Maybe," she rolled her eyes at her friend's clueless theory.


	9. Chapter 9: Food Poisonous Venom

Chapter Nine: Food Poisonous Venom

When they got back to the camp, Alexis broke off from the group to go looking for Zero. She eventually found him alone in the rec. room, sitting on the couch, twiddling his thumbs. She took a deep breath.

"Hey," she greeted, sitting down beside him.

He looked up at the sound of her voice. "Hey," he smiled back. They sat in silence for a moment.

"So… thank you," Alexis said after a moment.

"Huh?" he looked mildly confused.

She sighed and smiled. "I saw the hole, dude. You expect me to believe that little elves suddenly appeared, finished my digging and then disappeared without anybody noticing?"

Zero laughed to himself. "Hey, anything's possible."

Alexis playfully rolled her eyes. "And I wasn't even supposed to finish today. Why'd you do two holes? You must be exhausted, and now I feel bad."

He shrugged and looked away. "Don't feel bad, Kitty. I like digging holes. And besides, your hole was already started. Now you can save it for when you can really enjoy it," he half-smiled, meeting her gaze once more. "And with X-Ray letting everyone have the day off tomorrow, I needed to get ahead with an extra hole. Gotta keep up, you know."

Alexis laughed, but didn't have time to respond because a second later Lauren and the rest of the D-Tent boys entered the rec. room noisily.

"Hey guys," Alexis cleared her throat and leaned back, shifting her position on the couch as the others came over.

Some of the guys looked at the two with their eyebrows raised, but Lauren walked over and sat on the couch. "I'm EXHAUSTED!" she declared loudly, collapsing into the cushions. "I have almost no energy left in me! If only someone had been nice enough to dig MY hole for me, maybe I would not be feeling so faint!" She placed her hand on her forehead dramatically.

Alexis rolled her eyes. "Must you always be an idiot?"

"Hey, I saved your life!" Lauren suddenly shot.

"It was your fault my life was in danger in the first place!"

"Well, you should be watching where you're going!"

"Relax guys! Caveman broke into their argument. "It doesn't really matter, anyways."

"Yeah, what's done is done," X-Ray nodded, sitting down on Alexis' other side.

"Hey, everyone!" A random guy who was twitching fiercely came running into the rec. room.

"New guy," X-Ray leaned over to explain to the girls.

"No… really?" Lauren replied sarcastically. "I could've sworn I just saw him yesterday!" Alexis reached over X-Ray and clapped her in the back of the head.

"Sup," Zigzag called over towards the new guy who came running over, squishing himself in the middle of the couch between Alexis and X-Ray.

"Hi, guys!" he repeated. One eye blinked furiously. His fingers twined together numerous times, as if he was trying to figure out how many different ways he could connect them in less than a second.

"Hi, Twitchy," Alexis mumbled back, officially squished.

"Hey, nice nickname!" Squid grinned approvingly.

"Why thank you," she replied sweetly.

"So what are you in for, Twitch?" X-Ray asked.

Twitch looked over to X-Ray, his legs tapping at the ground rhythmically, keeping steady pace with his eyelids. "I've got a thing for cars," he admitted hesitantly. "You think I'm twitching now? You should've seen me behind the wheel of that mustang convertible! Vroom, vroom!" He let out a nervous laugh.

Lauren raised her eyebrows. "Dude, calm down."

Alexis nodded. "Take it from someone who's been there, man. Switch to decaf."

"Nah, I don't drink coffee," he grinned. The girls exchanged wary glances.

"Hey, supper time!" Caveman announced, standing up. "You guys coming?" The rest of D-Tent trouped into the dining hall and grabbed their trays. Lauren looked down at her food.

"What. The hell. Is that?"

There was a chunk of red meat surrounded by a strange yellowish liquid. Lauren felt her stomach tremble. As they all sat down, Caveman took a tentative bite.

"It's chicken," he decided. Lauren took a bite, clapped her hands over her mouth, and rushed out of the room.

"Uh… not hungry," Alexis mumbled unsurely to her try, pushing it away from her and folding her arms across the table.

"Give it a few weeks. You'll get used to the food," Zero sighed sympathetically from beside her, poking at the lump on his plate with a fork.

"Trust me," Alexis gulped, forcibly overpowering her gag reflex. "I won't be used to it in a few weeks."

"We'd better go check on her before Mr. Sir catches her and goes ballistic," Zigzag sighed, getting to his feet. The rest of the D-Tent followed, eager to get away from the vile smell that was drifting from the so-called "meat."

Sure enough, they found Lauren hunched over a garbage can outside, moaning. Mr. Sir was on his way over to her, with a malicious look in his eyes.

"Well, shit," Alexis observed. She and Zigzag walked over to Lauren, trying to get her to stand up, but she was refusing.

"I knew girls couldn't hack it here at Camp Green Lake," Mr. Sir laughed harshly as he caught sight of Lauren's limp body.

"Hey, give her a break," Zigzag retorted quietly.

Mr. Sir raised his eyebrows at him. "What did you just say to me?"

"He said, give the girl a break," Alexis spoke louder, crossing her arms in front of her chest. Behind her, the boys started whispering.

"Oh shit, they're in for it now."

"Who do you think would win in a fight? Mr. Sir or the girls?"

"My bet's on the girls."

"But dude, Mr. Sir's got a gun. All they got is their fists…"

"But Mr. Sir doesn't got the nerve to waste bullets."

"And the girls' got nothing but nerve, so I agree with him."

"I miss my mommy."

"Do you think if Mr. Sir tried to run away, they would chase him?"

"Probably not. They'd probably just put a bunch of yellow-spotted lizards in his bunk and be done with it."

"Eww… I got that chicken piss-colored crap on my jumpsuit…"

"This camp has gotten very interesting since the girls showed up, hasn't it?"

"No kidding. Imagine what would happen if we had like a truckload of them!"

Lauren tried to glare at Mr. Sir, but it didn't look very threatening coming from behind a garbage can. She clapped her hands over her mouth and turned back to the can, throwing up everything she'd eaten in the last 24 hours. Zigzag knelt beside her with Alexis, who held her hair back for her.

"I told the warden that girls couldn't handle it here," Mr. Sir continued gleefully, not caring about Lauren's health. "Now I have proof! I'm going to go tell her!"

He turned around and was about to go walking happily to the warden's cabin when he heard Lauren mutter, "Who the hell let THAT idiot have access to a kitchen?" referring to whoever had cooked their dinner that night.

The boys that had followed Lauren outside all gasped as Mr. Sir stopped dead in his tracks. Everyone knew that he helped cook in the kitchens sometimes, and tonight had apparently been one of those nights. Well, everyone seemed to know about it, except for the girls.

"What did you say?" Mr. Sir asked without turning around. His tone was frighteningly quiet.

Lauren wiped her mouth on her jumpsuit sleeve. Alexis quickly ordered one of the boys to go get her some water. "The chicken," Lauren repeated with disgust. "Someone hear sure doesn't know how to cook. I think it killed my insides." Alexis handed her a water bottle, which had been retrieved by Squid.

Suddenly, Mr. Sir whirled around and practically flew over to where Lauren was. He grabbed her by the arm and as a second thought grabbed Alexis as well. "You can come with us as well. The warden will be very interested to hear about your blatant disrespect to your superiors."

"I don't see any of them here," Alexis put in.

Mr. Sir marched them up to the warden's cabin, fuming. He knocked on the door, angrily shifting from foot to foot with impatience. As they heard the door begin to open, Mr. Sir grinned nastily. "You're in for it now!" Alexis looked over to see that the guys had followed them over—Zero sent her a worrisome glance.

As the door opened, everyone under the age of 18 who was present gasped and went wide-eyed. Long reddish hair, denim shorts and a snowy white tank top revealed a woman roughly in her early 30s.

"THAT'S the warden?" Alexis heard Zigzag whisper from beside her.

"What's going on?" The warden questioned. She pulled out an ancient Chinese-style fan and began flapping it. "Come on, hurry up, you're letting all the cold out."

"This one's complaining about the food," Mr. Sir pointed out, shoving a green-faced Lauren forwards. The warden raised her eyebrows.

"Oh yes, I must be punished for allowing myself to be poisoned by someone I was told to believe actually knew how to not try to kill kids. Off with my head!" Lauren muttered sarcastically. The warden looked disgusted and backed away slightly.

"I think the real issue here is why the hell do you let this cowboy-wanna-be cook for us. Shorty was fine before she took a bite of that moron's food, and now she probably needs to be hospitalized!" Alexis defended.

The warden nodded absently. "Kitty-Cat, be a good little girl and fetch me that box over there," she spoke after a moment. She obeyed. "Yeah, that box on the dresser, right over there."

When she got back and placed the box in her hands, she set it down on a coffee table and opened it slowly. She pulled out a small bottle of red nail polish and unscrewed the lid carefully. "This is my special nail polish," she began explaining, applying a coat on her nails. Alexis and Lauren exchanged a glance. 'Nail polish?' Alexis mouthed.

"Do you like the color? I mixed it myself. Do you want to know the secret ingredient? It's rattle snake venom. It's perfectly harmless," she continued. She looked at her nails and smiled evilly. "When it's dry." She walked over to where Mr. Sir, Alexis, and Lauren were standing inside. The other boys were waiting outside, probably listening at the door.

Suddenly, without any warning, she pulled her hand back and smacked Mr. Sir in the face. He fell to the ground and began yelping in pain.

"Dude!" Lauren gasped, dodging away from Mr. Sir.

Stifled cries from the boys outside, who now probably thought that the warden had just slapped one of the girls and were now freaking out about it, were overpowered by Mr. Sir's thrashing about on the floor.

"Hmm… I gotta get me some of that nail polish," Alexis mused.

"Now, if you ever try to poison these kids and then come crying to me that they're sick, I will PERSONALLY drop you into a hole filled with yellow-spotted lizards!" The warden yelled down at Mr. Sir. His face was already purple and swelling to incredibly disgusting lumps in places.

"Eh, been there, done that," Lauren muttered, flashing a wild glance towards Alexis who smirked.

"You kids are free to go," the warden looked back up at the girls. "Shorty, feel better soon, dear," she smiled before turning away. The girls shrugged, and both kicked Mr. Sir once each before turning and running.

D-Tent ran all the way back to the camp; the girls giving a very brief, yet vivid, description of what went on inside the warden's cabin. Once they reached the rec. room, Shorty seemed to be feeling a lot better.

"Hey, how did the warden know our nicknames?" she asked.

Caveman grinned. "The warden knows everything," he explained. "She's got little tiny cameras everywhere."

Squid began ticking off his fingers. "In the mess hall, the tents, the showers, the rec. room… basically everywhere except for where we dig."

"The showers! Gross!" Lauren exclaimed.

"That's just wrong," Alexis agreed, whole-heartedly.

"Yeah, well she needs to know what's going on," X-Ray explained. "You know, to find out if anyone has been misbehaving."

"Right," Lauren responded. "She obviously has cameras everywhere. Like that would ever happen. Have any of you even seen any of these supposed cameras?" She folded her arms in front of her.

No one answered.

"I rest my case."

Suddenly Mr. Sir walked by them, clutching his face. He glared at the people that stared at him—which was pretty much everyone. "Don't think you've got away with this," he growled at Lauren and Alexis. "This ain't over."

"Yeah, whatever. Move it you freakish cowboy, you're hurting my eyes!" Alexis smirked. Mr. Sir's face went pale and he walked away quickly. Zero just laughed.

"Kitty, I think you just insulted him. He's very proud of who he is."

"Cowboy's are lame," Lauren argued. "Especially washed up ones like him."

Alexis nodded. "No kidding, it's like the Village People out here. I think I may never recover if I see a cop coming around." Lauren seemed to get it, but the others simply stared blankly.

"What are Village People?" Magnet asked slowly.

Alexis' expression dropped. "Shorty, we seriously need to teach these boys more about the real world," she declared. "I'm officially suggesting that we spend at least an hour or two every day after digging, educating them on the wonders of our marvelous world!"

Lauren laughed before pretending to be disgusted. "I agree. How do you people survive out here?! Like honestly, now, no sarcasm, no knowledge, no nothing! I'm shocked that none of you have attempted suicide yet!"

Zigzag rolled his eyes and playfully shoved her across the couch.

"Oh, so the girls think they know so much now," X-Ray mused, shoving Alexis backwards over the same couch before sitting down between them. Alexis, however, chose to remain upside-down, laying over the back of the couch.

"You know, if you think you're so smart, if you dig one hole a day for five years, how many holes do you dig?" Caveman challenged, leaning towards them.

"Easy!" Lauren exclaimed, waving the question away. "You've dug 1825 holes." She crossed her arms like a smartass. There was a moment of silence before…

"EEEUH!" The guys shrieked in unison, indicating that she was wrong. The sudden noise caused Alexis to scream randomly and flinch, which resulted in her losing her balance and sliding off the couch to the floor. Laughing, Squid and X-Ray pulled her to her feet.

"Once every 4 years there's a leap year so there are 366 days a year, so at a minimum it would be 1826 holes. Unless there are two leap years within the five years, in which case it would be 1827 holes," Zero piped up.

Lauren gaped at the guys. "Oh, well, excuse me! I'm so sorry that I forgot about the freakish leap years! Because I was obviously going to count those!" She whirled around and marched off, muttering "Stupid freaks," under her breath.

"Shorty, wait up!" Alexis called, rushing after her friend. "Don't worry, we're not going to judge you on your math skills."

"My math skills are perfectly fine," she grumbled.

Alexis thought for a moment. "Okay… well we won't judge you on your common sense kills or your memory then, either!"

Lauren scowled at her. "Jesus. While you're at it, why don't you just give me a few nice paper cuts between my fingers and toes and pour some lemon juice in them!" she exclaimed dramatically before stomping away from the rec. room.

Alexis sighed before turning around and frowning. "Hey, asshole! That's my spot!" she declared.

Squid stretched out his legs and smirked mischievously. "I don't see your name on it," he retorted triumphantly.

She rolled her eyes in response. "Boys," she muttered dramatically. "Always making things difficult." Instead of simply taking another seat, or remaining standing, she strode over to Squid and sat down on his lap, leaning back between his chest and the armrest of the couch. He casually laid his arms across her own lap as though she was a table, while she rested her legs across X-Ray's lap.

Zigzag shook his head in amusement, getting to his feet. "I'm gonna go make sure Shorty doesn't knock herself out with a shovel."

"Shut up! I did that ONE time!" Caveman exclaimed defiantly.

Chuckling, Zigzag followed Lauren out of the rec. room.

With a sigh, Alexis lolled her head to look at Zero. "So, what do you guys do for fun around here?"

They seemed genuinely confused about her question. "Uh… we're doing it right now, Kitty," Zero replied after a moment. "This is all we do for 'fun.'"

"What?!" Alexis cried out. "This is IT?! That's just cruel and unusual! Sick and wrong! Does not compute!"

X-Ray sighed. "Yeah. It's not much."

"Hey, Shorty," Zigzag called, finally finding her pouting outside by the back of the rec. room. He sat down beside her.

"Hi." She replied coldly, crossing her arms in front of her.

"So, what's wrong?" he asked after a moment.

"Oh, just the whole world making fun of me," she sighed sarcastically.

"Aww, come on. You know they didn't mean it like that. They were just messing around with you guys, you know? And I'm sure they're really, REALLY sorry…" his voice trailed off as he slid his face into a puppy-dog pout. Lauren was able to keep a straight face for about 3.78 seconds as his eyes blinked furiously.

"My GOD, why is everyone suddenly an expert on the puppy-dog pout?!" she exclaimed.

Laughing, Zigzag helped Lauren to her feet and brought her back to the rec. room.

"Hey! You're back!" Alexis greeted as Lauren and Zigzag returned.

"Yeah, and you're being a whore," Lauren observed, raising her eyebrows as she caught sight of Alexis on Squid's lap, his arms around her waist, legs stretched out over X-Ray with her head leaning back now on Zero's shoulder. Alexis narrowed her eyes.

"It's better than being a slut. At least whores get laid and paid," she muttered.

Lauren whirled back to Alexis, her eyes wide. "YOU GOT LAID BY SQUID?!"


	10. Chapter 10: Battle to the Death

Chapter Ten: Battle to the Death

"WHAT?!" Everyone in the rec. room yelled simultaneously, leaning towards Alexis and Squid. Squid jumped to his feet, ready to defend them, but forgetting for a second that she was on his lap. The surprised girl went flying off the couch and hit the ground, rolling. Lauren jumped over her, and she ended up rolling right into the side of the foosball table with a loud 'THUD' as her head connected with one of the legs of the table.

There was a short moment of silence, and then Squid, X-Ray and Zero ran over to see if she was okay, or even alive. Lauren stood in the middle of the room, looking amused.

"Holy crap, what an overreaction," she laughed. She caught sight of Squid glaring at her as he helped Alexis to her feet. "Sorry, Squid. I didn't actually mean that."

"Yeah, sure," Squid mumbled as Alexis managed to steady herself, rubbing her head. Both faces had an irritated shade of pink. Noticing that everyone in the rec. room, aside from the D-Tent, was still starting at them, Alexis rolled her eyes.

"Nothing happened!" she cried out defiantly.

"Yeah, Shorty was just daydreaming again," Squid added loudly, smirking at Lauren.

"I don't daydream about that kind of stuff!" Lauren protested. "It was just the way Kitty said whores get laid AND paid, I thought maybe she got laid but you just didn't pay her. It's not my fault! She was sitting on his lap!"

"So what! He stole my spot, I'm not going to stand for that-no pun intended!" Alexis objected.

"Holy crap, this is a pointless conversation," Magnet mumbled.

"No kidding!"

"Yeah, like what the hell? Ooh, spoons…"

"I still miss my mommy! She won't return my mail!"

"You guys can get so off-topic," Lauren observed.

Suddenly Mr. Sir ran into the room, his face red with anger. "What's going on in here?!" he snarled. "Can't you girl scouts just stay quiet for five minutes?"

"You know, that's a very sexist thing to say," Alexis remarked.

Mr. Sir glared at her. "There ain't nothing wrong with being sexist." He started to advance on her with slit eyes, clearly trying to be intimidating. Alexis cocked her head to the side, partially amused at his failed attempt. "And if you want, you can go take it up with the warden."

Alexis scoffed. "Oh, yea. Last time you tried to sick the warden on us she bitch-slapped you across the face with snake venom. What are you trying to do, get backhanded now, or something? Is that it?"

The campers burst out laughing.

"Yeah, so run along Cowboy, and leave us to talk about our very awesome things," Lauren commanded with a flick of the wrist.

Mr. Sir sneered. "You're just stupid, childish rejects who serve no productive purpose to society, and that's why you're here. What 'very awesome things' could you possibly have to talk about?"

"How about Squid and Kitty getting bu-zay?" X-Ray interjected, grinning.

"What?!" Alexis, Squid, and Mr. Sir immediately yelled. The group burst out laughing as Mr. Sir scrambled to find the right words and Alexis smacked X-Ray upside the head.

"Idiot," she muttered. "Now he's going to yell."

"What the hell has been going on in here?" Mr. Sir shouted, his face turning a darker shade of purplish red. "Relationships are strictly prohibited here!"

"That must be a new rule," Zigzag grinned. "Because until the girls came this was an all-guys camp and most guys here aren't like that."

"Well…" Magnet sighed, throwing a clear suggestive look towards Armpit, who immediately punched him, looking shocked.

"Hey man! I ain't like that!" The room was filled with laughter once more.

Alexis smacked both of them. "Hey! Don't make fun of gay guys! They make the greatest friends EVER!" she defended fiercely.

"Well, either way!" Mr. Sir snapped. "There is to be no having fun at Camp Green Lake. You were sent here for a reason! You pay your debt to society by digging one hole every day. That's what turns the bad kids into good people!" "Noooooot really," Lauren countered bravely crossing her arms. "If you think about it, all it really does is turns us into mindless zombies."

"Exactly! Like how is that going to teach us a good lesson, hmm? The only thing I've really picked up here is that you seriously need to get out more," Alexis agreed.

"Yeah! The girls got a point, man!" Squid exclaimed. Multiple shouts of agreement rang through the rec. room until Mr. Sir finally got pissed off and stormed out of the rec. room, muttering about, "damn, self-righteous kids of today."

"Well that was easy," Zigzag grinned triumphantly.

"Well duh, that's cause we're girls," Alexis stated with a smirk.

"Clearly the superior gender," Lauren nodded with a smiliar grin. "Haven't you noticed how we're basically starting to run this place?" Her tone made it sound like it was the most obvious fact in the world.

"Chyea!" Alexis laughed as the two high-fived proudly.

Zigzag raised an eyebrow mischievously. "Is it just me, guys, or did I hear a challenge in those words?"

Magnet grinned. "Nah, I'm definitely sensing the challenge as well."

"Care to attempt to prove yourselves, then?" X-Ray crossed his arms playfully over his broad chest and glared down over Alexis.

Alexis stood her ground and returned the mocking evil glare of death. She didn't miss the annunciation of "attempt". "I'm willing to PROVE ourselves if Shorty is," she accepted the challenge, turning to Lauren.

Lauren narrowed her eyes, hands on her hips. "Bring it on, boys."

Caveman grinned. "Deal, so between the D-tent boys and the new D-tent girls, first team to get the other team to surrender wins Best Gender. Any rules we should set in before starting, cause we cannot add in anything later."

The two girls talked quietly amongst themselves for a moment.

"All we can really think of is no using your strength, and, or, height against us," Alexis announced. Both girls were clearly shorter than all the boys, and definitely lacked the huge muscles that came with digging huge holes every day for many months, having arrived not even a week ago.

"Yeah, so like no actually hit-fighting, if you know what we mean," Lauren agreed.

The guys nodded. "That's fair."

Rather amused, fighting back smirks as they silently coordinated with the others on their own teams, the groups split up throughout the rec. room and spread themselves out.

Realizing what was going down, the other members of the camp pressed against the walls of the room, eagerly taking quick bets on who would win.

Apparently the boys had devised a "divide and conquer" method. While Alexis and Lauren had split up, Zigzag, Armpit, and Caveman were surrounding Lauren while X-Ray, Squid, Zero and Magnet had officially cornered Alexis.

"Ready...set...GO!" Someone yelled from the sidelines, and all Hell broke loose.

Lauren immediately leapt at Caveman's legs and tackled him to the ground. His stance caught Armpit by the upper arm/shoulder and they both flew back into the foosball table.

"And then there was one.." Lauren stood up to face Zigzag with a smug grin.

"Hey! I thought we said no hit-fighting!" Zigzag yelled, startled.

"Dude, this aint actually fighting! Fighting is more punching, kicking, and trying to make the

other bleed. THIS is more...advanced wrestling," she laughed. "Whatcha waiting for, Zigs? Bring it!"

The same time that Lauren had sprung at Caveman, Alexis did the exact same thing across the room with Magnet. She got him to the floor before X-Ray came up behind her and got her in a headlock, pulling her off of his teammate.

"Got her!" he exclaimed triumphantly. "Kitty you'd better surrender soon, if ya know what's good for ya," he mused.

Alexis scoffed. "You don't think I can escape from this pathetic headlock?" Without waiting for an answer, she swept her foot back, knocking X-Ray down, Slipping out of his hold gracefully.

She turned to face Squid and Zero with a devilish grin on her face, crouched to a spritn. "Now let's get this party started!"

Squid blinked and looked down at Zero who had the same shocked expression rested on his face. "Holy shit!" he gaped, eyes darting between both girls. "These girls are crazy! You sure they aren't like on steroids or something?"

Alexis stole a quick glance over to see how her friend was doing. Lauren had started charging towards Zigzag when Caveman reached out and grabbed her ankle from his position on the floor. Lauren crashed to the ground with a startled and a grinning Zigzag immediately ran over and sat on her back, pinning her to the ground.

"Gotcha," he mused.

"NO!!!!" Lauren complained, beating her fists on the ground. "That's SO not fair! You can't sit on the opponent! FOUL!"

"Anything except actual fighting, right Shorty?" Zigzag happily replied, an innocent tone creeping into his voice. "So, are you gonna make your life harder than it has to be or will you give in?" he asked smugly, clearly enjoying the advantage.

"NEVER!!!!" Lauren cried out defiantly.

Zigzag sighed, pretending this was an actual set-back for him. "Oh well. I guess I'm gonna have to resort to something I really didn't wanna do... tickle time!"

"What!?" Lauren shrieked. "No way! That's DEFINATELY unfair!! Don't you dare or I'll--" her throat was cut off as Zigzag reached down and tickled her side. "You bastard!!" she yelled, between fits of laughter, trying to squirm out from under him. "I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!!"

Alexis rolled her eyes. "Oh shit," she muttered under her breath as she spotted Lauren under Zigzag. Immediately she leapfrogged over Zero, who had attempted to grab her by the legs, and sprinted over across the rec. room. By this time, Armpit and Caveman had regained themselves and were now helping Zigzag torture Shorty.

"BAM!" Alexis exclaimed in triumph as she ploughed into Zigzag, knocking him clean off Lauren who sprang to her feet and leapt at Caveman without hesitation.

"Dude! You can't take care of yourself for two minutes without someone watching your back?" Alexis sighed exasperatedly, keeping Zigzag safely pinned to the floor. The rest of the guys quickly ran to join the newly forming, larger group.

"Hey! You can't run away! That's like giving up--unless you ARE surrendering?" X-Ray grinned as he and Squid lunged forwards and plucked Alexis off of Zigzag, and quickly had her pinned to the ground with Zero. Magnet had run over to Zigzag and were both now prying Shorty off of the other two.

"If you think we're surrendering, you need SERIOUS brain injury!" Alexis retorted through gritted teeth, trying to squirm away.

Zigzag grabbed Lauren's arms and dragged her off of Caveman and Armpit. The guys that were watching cheered as Magnet grabbed her legs and the two carried her over to the others.

"This is SO unfair!!" Lauren yelled, trying to slip out of their hold. "Just because we're small, you think you can pick us up, or pin us down whenever the hell you feel like it! Put me down, damn it!!!"

X-Ray chuckled as Alexis got one of her hands free and socked Squid over the head. "Not ready to admit defeat yet?"

"Hell no! Shorty and I are gonna win, you just wait!" Alexis growled, hitting Squid again. Lauren got one hand free and grabbed Zigzag's leg, causing him to topple over, taking down Magnet as he went. Lauren rolled away from them laughing.

"Nice one!" Alexis complimented, suddenly throwing X-Ray and Zero off of her and sliding away, just barely out of Squid's reach. "We will never be beaten!!"

"It aint over yet!" Caveman laughed as they guys got back on their feet, and ran towards the girls. At the very last second, Lauren and Alexis both dodged out of the way. The guys attacked the air and fell to the ground, utterly shocked and confused. Laughing, the girl girls leaped into the air and planted themselves atop the dog-pile proudly.

"Surrender, puny males!" Lauren pumped her fist in the air.

"NO!!" They all cried out, somehow managing to pull the girls down, pinning them beneath them on the ground again.

Squid sat down on Alexis again and began poking her repeatedly. "You're never gonna win! You're never gonna win! You're never gonna win!" he chanted.

"Can't you guys just surrender?" Armpit pleaded. "I can't remember the last time I felt this tired!"

"We will never give up!" the girls chorused.

"I'll give you guys my supper tonight?" X-Ray bargained.

Lauren laughed. "Dude. Do you know the kind of food this place has? Definitely not good enough!"

"Two nights?"

"No!"

"We can't be bought!"

"How about shower tokens?" Caveman suggested. "You can have mine for today and tomorrow."

"That's sad," Alexis scoffed, rolling her eyes, still struggling to break free from the guys.

"Three days then!"

"Give it up!"

"Mine and Caveman's for four days!" Armpit broke in. Everyone gagged at the thought of Armpit going for four days without a shower.

"No way, you need them more than we do!" Lauren responded.

"Five days!" Caveman exclaimed.

"Both our tokens for six days, and X-Ray's meals for three," Squid offered.

Alexis fought a smirk. "Sounds like someone's getting desperate."

"Jesus, you guys!" Zigzag yelled. "What will it take to get you to surrender already?"

Lauren thought for a second. "Well..."

"What in bloody Hell is going on in here?!" Mr. Sir's outraged voice filled the rec. room.


	11. Chapter 11: Random Tragedy

_Okay, so I'm sorry but this is a really short chapter… Please don't hurt me! The next one will probably be longer! _

Chapter Eleven: Random Tragedy 

Everyone's eyes popped wide open as they all went stiff, completely freezing in place. Not even the girls were ready with their scathing, blistering retorts. Those who had been standing off to the sides watching, and cheering on, booked it out of the room.

Mr. Sir stomped towards the mass of teenagers on the ground. "I thought I had made it perfectly clear that this sort of tomfoolery is strictly FORBIDDEN!" his face was nearly purple with fury. When nobody moved a muscle, he continued with his tirade. "Hey you young men, get off of those damned girls, already!" he bellowed. Everyone immediately scrambled to their feet.

"Is someone a little cranky because they haven't gotten some action in a while?" Alexis whispered. Zero smirked.

After a ten minute lecture, Mr. Sir left once more.

"That man really needs to get out more," X-Ray sighed, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"No kidding," Lauren agreed.

"Anyways, where were we?" Zigzag grinned slyly.

Alexis matched the grin. "You guys were begging us to give up, which basically meant that you were surrendering so HA we win!"

"Woo!" Lauren laughed high-fiving Alexis.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Caveman shook his head. "No way. We're NOT surrendering."

"Well, guess what genius, neither are we," Lauren retorted stubbornly.

"So how should we settle this then?" Magnet scratched his head.

"A battle to the death!" Lauren declared, sarcastically.

"Dude, what's wrong with you?" Armpit asked, shocked.

Lauren sighed. "It's called a joke," she rolled her eyes at him.

"No more battling!" Squid exclaimed. "My bruises are going to have bruises."

"I'm sore all over," X-Ray agreed. He sat down on the couch and leaned back. "I must say, I'm pretty impressed with your fighting abilities. Most girls I know couldn't beat up a 7-year-old." He grinned. "But for you guys to get beat… It'd probably take a 10-year-old."

"Hey!" Lauren protested. "Then you guys must just completely suck ass!"

"It's called a joke," Alexis pointed out. "I think they're catching on to sarcasm."

There was a sudden rumbling noise deep inside the earth, and everyone in the rec. room (which was only D-Tent) looked down. "What was that?" Lauren asked. "It sounds like the earth had some bad gas…"

"Maybe it's all that spicy food…" Alexis thought aloud.

Squid's face went pale. "I know that sound," he whispered. "Everybody get down! EARTHQUAKE!" As everyone dived to the ground, the world began to shake! It was like someone had grabbed the rec. room, picked it up, and had given it to a small child who was using it as a rattle. Lauren looked up and dived out of the way just in time before a shelf crashed to the ground where she had been a minute ago.

There was an ear-splitting crash as the doorframe collapsed into itself, blocking the exit. Then, as suddenly as it had started, it stopped.

Alexis peeked out cautiously from behind the couch. "Well that was bizarre…" she observed.

"Do you get a lot of earthquakes out here?" Lauren asked, rubbing her elbows.

No one was listening to her. They were all staring in shock at the collapsed door. "We're trapped," Magnet whispered mellow-dramatically.

"Oh, fuck my life!" Alexis snapped, looking at the fallen door. "We're all gonna die, anyways."

"No we won't!" Zigzag piped up. "We can't think like that or else we'll all perish in a conundrum of epic proportions!"

Alexis stared at him for a moment. "I was thinking more along the lines of, one day we'll all croak since we're biological beings that will eventually die one day, so my life might as well start getting screwed over now. But I like the optimism," she smiled.

"Come on guys, we gotta think! How are we going to get ourselves out of here?" X-Ray questioned loudly.

"Can we dig our way out?" Lauren guessed.

"It's worth a shot," Squid replied.

The trapped teenagers began to claw at the mass of debris. Moments later, after they finally managed to clear a portion of a hole, the entire wall and what was left of the ceiling in that area started to shake.

"Hit the deck!" Squid bellowed, shoving himself and Alexis out of the way as the others scrambled to take cover from the collapsing building. Once it was over, everybody was left—relatively unharmed—in an even smaller section of the rec. room.

"Well, that wasn't smart," Caveman sighed.

"Looks like we're going to be stuck here for a while," Magnet coughed. "At least until someone goes for help. But my best guess is it'll be a couple of days."

Lauren groaned, leaning against Zigzag's back. "Looks like we're going to die after all; of TBS." When none of the guys responded, she continued, "Tragic Boredom Syndrome."

"Not necessarily," Alexis shrugged. "Anybody up for a game of Truth or Dare?"

_I know, I know, I'm sorry if that kind of sucked… but at least it's something. _

_Right? _


	12. Chapter 12: Truth or Dare

_Okay, this is the last chapter… Hope you enjoy it!_

Chapter Twelve: Truth or Dare

Squid and X-Ray exchanged knowing glances before grinning and nodding. "We're in. You guys?" Squid turned to face the others.

All the other guys nodded, and Lauren narrowed her eyes. "We're trapped in this room for a couple days, maybe even longer, with no food or water, and all you guys can think about is playing a joyful little game?" she asked disgustedly.

"So… is that a no?" Caveman asked.

"Hell no! I'm playing!" she grinned and clapped excitedly.

Alexis clapped with Shorty in delight. "Well then, let's get this thing going! I'll start. So let's see, um… Armpit!" she yelled suddenly, startling everyone. "Truth or dare?"

"Oh… uh, well…" he stuttered, taken by surprise. "I dunno. I guess, um, I'll pick dare."

"Hmm…" Alexis hummed aloud. "What shall we have Armpit do…" The guys began shouting out random suggestions.

"Make him wear women's clothing!"

"Make him get bitten by a yellow-spotted lizard!"

"Make him talk in a British accident!"

"Make him hit himself if the face!"

"Enough!" Lauren exclaimed suddenly, snapping her fingers and shutting everybody up. "Kitty, make him…" she whispered the rest so that nobody else would hear.

Kitty grinned and choked down a laugh. "Okay… Armpit, I dare you to sing and dance to the Milkshake song."

He stared at her blankly for a moment.

Alexis sighed. "Don't tell me you never heard of the Milkshake song. It's like, 'My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and there life is better than yours, damn right it's better than yours, I could teach you but I'd have to charge…'"

A look of sudden understanding flashed across his face before becoming nervous. After much poking, prodding, threatening, and bribing, he finally did the dare.

"Nice, Armpit, nice," Lauren chuckled as the red-faced boy sat back down, several moments later.

"Yeah, yeah," Armpit suddenly grinned. "Zero, truth or dare?"

Everyone turned to face the smaller boy sitting against the wall.

"Oh, um… truth, I guess." He clearly seemed to fear picking dare when there were people in the enclosed space who were willing to dare him to get bitten by a yellow-spotted lizard, and be ready to kill him if he backed down.

Armpit thought for a second before deciding to go relatively easy on him. "Hmm, okay then. Did you have a girlfriend before you came to Camp Green Lake?" he asked suggestively. There was an outbreak of laughter and Zero smiled.

"What a waste of a question," X-Ray shook his head. "I mean, there are so many things that you could've, and SHOULD'VE"—he threw a suggestive glance towards Alexis—"asked him!"

"Regardless, X-Ray. It was Armpit's turn so can ask Zero anything he wants to know. You're answer, Zero?" Alexis hastily responded, finishing by turning to face him.

"Nope," he smiled simply. "Caveman, truth or dare?"

"Well I really don't trust you guys with dare, so I guess I pick truth," he responded nervously.

The game was interrupted by a sudden shout from outside the building. "Hey, are there any girl scouts in there?"

"In here!" Squid yelled. "All of D-Tent is in here!"

"The WHOLE D-Tent?" Mr. Pendanski's voice joined Mr. Sir's. "How the hell did they manage that…? Don't answer," he added. "We've got some crews coming to get you guys out. The only problem is that they won't be here for several days."

"Oh, BRILLIANT!" Alexis sighed, exasperated.

"Well, on the bright side, we won't have to dig for a while," Magnet grinned.

"True, very true my friend, but I think there's still the matter of NO FOOD OR WATER AND THE BUILDING COULD COLLAPS ON US AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT!" Lauren shouted as though it was obvious.

"Calm yourself, Shorty," Alexis reassured her, walking over to one of the cabinet shelves along the wall that had yet to collapse. Opening one of the doors, she revealed three large jugs of water and about a few days worth of food, stacked according to meals. "I looked this place up on the internet the other night. Apparently they get a few earthquakes every once in a while, so I decided to stock the rec. room, mess hall, and our cabin, just in case any of us got trapped."

"Wait… you get internet out here?" Squid asked skeptically.

Alexis shrugged. "Duh… on my cell phone," she replied as though it was obvious.

"Da-amn! Kitty, you're a lifesaver!" Zigzag exclaimed, pulling her into a hug. Alexis grinned proudly.

"Well now that we've gotten most of our survival issues out of the way, shall we now return to the issue of our death by T.B.S?" Lauren turned towards Zero.

He nodded. "Absolutely. Caveman, you picked truth right? Okay, hmm… Have you ever kissed a girl? If so, where and when?"

Everyone was silent as the turned to face Caveman, a pinkish tinge creeping onto his face.

"Come on Caveman, you gotta tell," Squid smirked, highly amused.

"You did pick truth," Zero added matter-of-factly.

Caveman sighed. "Alright, alright. Fine. Her name was Donna Hinkouse at my thirteenth birthday party. Happy?" he hastily replied quietly.

"Ooo," The boys chorused, shoving him and laughing.

"Yeah, yeah, okay that's enough!" he declared, trying to keep his poker-face. "Kitty, truth or dare?"

Alexis thought for a moment, mentally evaluating either option. "Dare!" she stated confidently. She didn't feel very safe either way, but at least with dare she could have some fun.

"Ooh!" the group all laughed at her recklessness.

"Think of something good, now," X-Ray winked at Caveman., nudging Alexis playfully. "You're in for it now, kid."

Alexis scoffed. "I'm not worried," she declared loudly. "I mean, this is Caveman we're talking about here."

"Hey!" Caveman exclaimed, insulted.

"She's got a point," Lauren added.

Caveman opened his mouth to rebuttal, before nodding in acceptance.

"Hmm. Okay Kitty, I dare you to sleep next to Armpit all night!" he grinned triumphantly. The entire room went dead silent.

"Dude! Dares are supposed to be funny, humiliating, occasionally a little risky, but not lethal!" Zero exclaimed, clearly concerned. "No offense, Armpit," he was quick to add.

Caveman shrugged. "They were bullying me… I had to redeem myself!"

Alexis rolled her eyes. "That was really a waste of a dare, dude. Even if I did actually do that, you wouldn't even know cause you'd be asleep too. Ergo, I don't really have to do it."

"Well, yeah, you kinda do," X-Ray answered, trying and failing to keep a straight face. "Playing truth or dare is a dangerous game, and you agreed to do all dares the moment you stated playing. In this case, Caveman's word is law."

Lauren sighed. "It's not like he told you to sleep on top of him or anything. You only have to sleep beside him. You won't even notice cause you'll be asleep."

"Well it doesn't really matter anyways," Zigzag interrupted as Alexis opened her mouth to reply. "Don't bother worrying about it till later. Kitty, go."

Alexis sighed and surveyed the group sitting around her. Suddenly her face broke into an evil smirk. Her eyes fell upon Lauren, who began fidgeting nervously. "I pick Shorty!" Alexis announced. "Truth or dare?"

"Um…" Lauren stuttered. "Truth," she finally decided.

Alexis thought for a moment. "Okay, Shorty. Do you _like,_ like any of these fine young men when you first arrived?" she cocked an eyebrow at her friend's red face.

"Of course I did! And thank you for bringing up such painful memories! While you're at it, why don't you give me a few nice paper cuts and pour lemon juice in them!" she exclaimed, promptly pretending to burst into hysterical tears.

Alexis rolled her eyes and smirked at her friend's ridiculousness, while the guys looked confused and worried at her sudden mood swing.

"Is… she gonna be okay?" Zigzag asked slowly.

"Uh… we're sorry Shorty," Caveman tried, patting her arm unsurely. Suddenly Lauren snapped her head up, completely tear-free, and was looking mildly horrified.

"THAT WAS SARCASM YOU SICK BASTARDS!!" she yelled. "NO, Kitty, I DIDN'T _like_ any of them when we first got here. Yes, yes, I'm a very cold, heartless person. Now shut it. X-Ray, truth or dare?"

"Uh… dare," he grinned confidently.

"Someone has a death wish," Lauren sneered.

"Bring it on, I ain't afraid," he challenged.

Lauren pretended to think for a few moments, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "I got it! X-Ray, I dare you to give someone a lap dance. You can choose who," she smirked.

X-Ray crossed his arms. "There's no music. You cannot give a lap dance with no music. Only penguins can do that."

"I've got my iPod," Alexis smirked. "And I left my speakers by the couch the other day. Would you prefer something faster like Cyclone by Baby Bash, or something a little more mellow, like Feel It by Jackalope?" she found it very hard to keep a straight face.

Suddenly, a metaphorical light bulb flashed over X-Ray's head. "Okay, get ready for a good lap dance, Shorty…" he smirked, advancing on her.

"Wha…? Ah! NO! Get away from me!" Lauren exclaimed, leaping over the back of the couch and curling herself into a ball, mumbling something about 'sick bastards'.

X-Ray grinned, sitting himself down on the couch. "Well, I made my choice and they didn't want to cooperate. Not my problem. Squid, truth or dare?"

"What?! No, hey! That doesn't count, don't try changing the subject!" Lauren yelped, slapping X-Ray in the back of the head.

"Ow!" X-Ray complained. "It does so count! You said it was my choice of who to give a lap dance to, and I chose you. It's not my fault if you didn't cooperate." He turned his head to look pointedly at her. "Unless you want to change your mind?"

"Hell no," she said flatly.

"Well then, let us continue with our joyous activities. Squiddy, truth or dare?"

Squid looked slightly anxious, but when he answered his voice was completely steady. "I'm going to pick dare."

"I was hoping that you would," X-Ray smiled evilly. "It's been a while since I heard some good music, so…" he widened his eyes and suddenly batted his eyelashes. "Sing me a song, Squiddy!"

"Dude! No way!" Squid shouted, jumping to his feet.

"Yes way!" Lauren cheered. "I wanna hear this!"

"I don't sing."

"You do now!"

"Forget it!"

"Sing, damn it!"

"You guys," Alexis interjected calmly, breaking up Squid and Shorty's argument. "Remember what was said earlier: you must follow everything that is said. So, Squiddy, you must sing us all a song now!"

Squid sighed. "But I don't know what to sing," he tried. And failed.

"Ever hear, More Than a Feeling by Boston?" Alexis flipped through her songs.

"Nope."

"Break My Stride, by Unique 11?"

"Nope."

Suddenly, Alexis' face lit up. "Sexy Back. Justin Timberlake."

"Uh…" Squid stumbled while the rest of the group laughed. "I don't know any of the words."

"That shouldn't be a problem," Lauren shook her head slyly, grabbing the iPod and pulling up the lyrics.

Squid groaned. "Don't do this to me," he pleaded.

X-Ray grinned as the music started up. "Too late, Squiddy!"

Looking unsure, Squid read out the lyrics as he sung the chorus. "I'm bringing sexy back… and all the boys just don't know how to act… if that's your girl you better watch your back… she'll burn it up with me and that's a fact…"

Everybody cheered once the song was over.

"Nice voice, Squiddy!"

"Call me Squiddy one more time and my fist will fly through your face faster than you can say Yellow-Spotted Lizard!" he growled.

"Hey, just be glad we didn't make you sing My Heart Will Go On," Alexis grinned. "Which I probably would have if I had it on here…"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," he grumbled. "Zigzag, truth or dare?"

Zigzag thought for a few seconds. "Truth," he stated confidently.

"Are you gay?" Squid asked quickly.

"What the hell?!" Lauren and Alexis shouted at him in unison, smacking him upside the head.

"It's a legitimate question!" Squid defended himself, rubbing the back of his head. "I mean, look at him. He's such a weird kid, and I'm just wondering if it's because he's gay." He looked over towards Zigzag. "No offense, but, answer me. Are you?"

Zigzag opened his mouth, but was silent for a second. Then a grin started to spread slowly across his face. "You know… You're such a beautiful man, Squid…" he began, sliding closer to him, wriggling his eyebrows.

"AH! Stay away from me!" Squid yelled, jumping to his feet.

"I'm not actually gay," Zigzag laughed. "You just scare too easy."

"Nice, Ziggy," Lauren chuckled.

Zigzag nodded. "I thought so too. Now, who has yet to be victimized…? Magnet! Truth or dare?"

Magnet groaned. Clearly he had been hoping he would have been overlooked. "Hey, uh, I think this game is getting kinda played out… don't you think?" he suggestive hopefully.

Lauren shook her head. "Quit stalling, and just choose!"

Magnet crossed his arms. "I don't want to."

Zigzag grinned evilly. "No, no, Magnet. You don't get out of this that easily. Truth? Or Dare?"

Magnet sighed in defeat as the others chimed in. "Fine. Uh… truth."

"Are you a virgin?" he asked after a moment.

"What the hell is with these questions?" Lauren exclaimed.

Magnet leaned back coolly. "Course I ain't no virgin, man. What a waste of a question," he scoffed. "Who's next?"

"Nice!" Zigzag nodded, pounding fists with Magnet.

Alexis stared at him for a moment. "LIAR!" she suddenly declared.

"What?" Magnet narrowed his eyes at her.

"You are too a virgin, buddy!" she smirked.

"What've you been stalking him for the past 16 years of his life?" X-Ray laughed.

Alexis shrugged. "You can tell when people are virgins and when they aren't."

"How?" Squid wondered curiously. Lauren rolled her eyes and kicked him in the shin.

She shrugged again. "I dunno. It's like… the way they walk, I guess."

Magnet folded his arms grumpily. "Shorty, truth or dare?" he asked hastily before the others could get in on him.

"Uh… I don't want to play anymore," Lauren whined.

"Too bad," Alexis shook her head. "We're stuck here for a few days. So you're playing."

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NEVER!"

Alexis and Lauren jumped to their feet, fists out, ready to kill eachother.

"We've been trapped for like fifteen minutes and they're ready to kill eachother," X-Ray sighed. "I really don't think they're going to make it for two or three more days." Holding his hands out, he walked between the girls who were shooting eachother the glare of death. "Now, ladies, calm yourselves down!"

Then Colin came in and blew them all up! He lived happily ever after. "Ha! Ha! Ha!" he chuckled as he tackled Alexis and punched her in the face. Then he went to walk away but fell into a time lapse and everything that had happened in this last paragraph was forgotten, considered to have never happened.

Folding her arms, Alexis sat down opposite a grouchy-looking Lauren. "Well then, Miss Shorty, what do YOU suggest we do to kill time then?"

Lauren opened her mouth to reply when there was a low rumbling. Everyone looked around nervously.

"Dude, what was that?" Zero asked, getting to his feet. He looked up at the ceiling just as a large beam dislodged from the ceiling at hit him in the head. He collapsed.

"Zero!" Alexis squealed. She jumped up and was about to run over to him when the roof quivered and fell, crushing everyone in the rec. room. Well, almost everyone.

"Holy crap!" Mr. Sir yelled. "Pendanski, get the hell over here!"

"Oh my God!" Mr. Pendanski exclaimed. "Everyone in D-Tent is dead! This is so horrible I cannot even begin to express the depths of this atrocious predicament!"

Mr. Sir stared at his distraught counselor, and then shrugged. "Destroy their records."

"I'm on it!" Mr. Pendanski wandered away.

Suddenly, Lauren and Alexis burst from the rubble, coughing.

"Kitty! Shorty! You're alive!" Mr. Sir exclaimed, pretending to be happy.

"Yeah, but everyone else is dead!" Lauren declared. Alexis was in tears.

"Well. So are you two," Mr. Sir growled, whipping out his gun and blowing their heads off. He turned to walk away when he saw some kid from A-Tent watching him with wide eyes. "What are you looking at?" he mumbled.

_The End! Sorry if you didn't like the ending… _

_And I can explain the random, "Then Colin came in…" thing. My friend, Colin, stole the notebook when I was working on it during our French class, then demanded to be in it, and before I could get it back from him he decided to write himself in. I just figured it was kind of random, so I may as well have kept it. _

_Anyways, hope you enjoyed this while it lasted. Not too late to review! :D_


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